Self-sabotage 150 up to doing them. On days when I felt I was ten feet tall and bullet proof I would turn to those tasks I had avoided and challenge myself to deal with them. On my bad hair days, I took it easy on myself and let myself off doing jobs that I knew were difficult for me. From time to time people call me on something I’ m supposed to have done and I run the excuse that I have been very busy lately. For me now, I know that I am speaking in code, a code that they may or may not have the emotional intelligence to understand. The more sophisticated people on the receiving end know that I would have found time to pick up my lotto winnings but not to do the job in question. Some read the code correctly and may or may not call me on it. Surprisingly, many respond as if they think being very busy( as most know I am) is a valid excuse. I just hope they don’ t read this book! My clients know not to waste time telling me that they haven’ t done their EAD or their shopping list because they have been‘ too busy’. First, I bore them with a lecture on the above. Then I threaten to go through every moment of their life over the last three weeks to ensure that everything they did do was more important than their physical and mental health. At this point they usually surrender, especially if we have been down this road with me before, and we move onto looking at why they might unconsciously not want to do what they would like to do consciously. So next time you say you haven’ t done something because life has been‘ just too mad’ and‘ there just aren’ t enough hours in a day’ just hope you are talking to someone with low emotional intelligence who does not know what you are really saying. Your next best chance is that they( you could substitute the word‘ boss’ here) will mentally note,‘ Right, this task is obviously not important to them, and they may be right; they have certainly done all of the important things.’ To summarise, the things we don’ t do are the things that are uncomfortable for us in some way.