Using GL to sort the good, the bad and the suicidal 134 research shows that men prefer to listen to recorded talks which, surprise, surprise, are available from my website. True love is helping someone special lose weight Getting the people with whom you share your fridge on side is the second strategic structure you need to get in place as part of doing battle with your fridge and pantry. Take the time to discuss these ideas with them. You will find that most people are interested in how to eat in a healthier way if they don’ t have to make too many sacrifices. If necessary you may need to pull out the bigger guns and remind them that if they care about you then one of the first things they can do is help you with your health. My working definition of love is the following: True Love is a commitment to nurturing personal growth in both ourselves and others. As you can see from this definition true love is not about feelings, because they come and go. True love is a longstanding commitment that requires us to empathize with and understand what our partner needs and then to do something to nurture this in them. It has been said that true love is a verb, not a noun. This idea reminds us that love is an action, not a feeling. You will also note from this definition that we have to work at loving ourselves just as much as others. To only love others is to be a martyr and generally they are pretty tedious people with poor intimate relationships. More to the point to be good at loving others we first need to look after ourselves or we will end up failing others as we burn out. Most importantly, unless we know how to nurture our own personal growth, we cannot really know how to nurture others. Unfortunately, to explore love any further is beyond the scope of this book.