The Gift of Counseling by Fr. Garry Richmeier, c. pp. s., Sacramental Minister at St. James Parish, Kansas City, Missouri
People have often asked me if I always wanted to be a priest. I usually respond by describing my decision to be ordained as a gradual process, involving growing up in the community, becoming comfortable with the idea of ministering as a priest, and valuing priesthood as a good way to help people. In some ways it feels like the priesthood“ happened” to me, in that things seemed to fall into place to get me here.
My journey to becoming a professional counselor was a little bit different. There was no community or organization guiding and supporting me along this path. It was rather an idea that came out of the blue, as it were, and persisted. Maybe it was a seed planted by my Dad when I was young. He always fancied himself an informal counselor. Sometimes the idea was simply in the back of my mind, and sometimes it had a more urgent feel to it. But it never disappeared.
The idea of becoming a trained counselor became more of a focus for me soon after I was ordained. People would come to me as a priest with their problems, asking for advice and help. I was always a pretty good listener, but that was the only thing I could do
8 • The New Wine Press • December 2016 that seemed helpful. I would give advice, but often they had heard that same advice from others and it was not helpful. I wanted to find a way to help more, and I thought training in counseling would enable me to do that.
Around this time I happened to pick up the book The Family Crucible by Augustus Napier and Carl Whitaker. It followed a family as they did family counseling with the authors. Reading that book was a real“ aha!” moment for me. It portrayed counseling not as fixing something that was wrong with individuals, but as helping all members of the family use their gifts and strengths to change the relational dynamics that resulted in problems. That book convinced me that that was the kind of counseling( often called Systems Theory Counseling) I wanted to do.
An opportunity came when the provincial director, Fr. Tom Albers, asked me to be director of our college formation program at Rockhurst University. It was not at the top of my list of preferred jobs, but I said I would do it if I could pursue a Masters Degree in Counseling at the University of Missouri-Kansas City