The Gift of Counseling by Fr . Garry Richmeier , c . pp . s ., Sacramental Minister at St . James Parish , Kansas City , Missouri
People have often asked me if I always wanted to be a priest . I usually respond by describing my decision to be ordained as a gradual process , involving growing up in the community , becoming comfortable with the idea of ministering as a priest , and valuing priesthood as a good way to help people . In some ways it feels like the priesthood “ happened ” to me , in that things seemed to fall into place to get me here .
My journey to becoming a professional counselor was a little bit different . There was no community or organization guiding and supporting me along this path . It was rather an idea that came out of the blue , as it were , and persisted . Maybe it was a seed planted by my Dad when I was young . He always fancied himself an informal counselor . Sometimes the idea was simply in the back of my mind , and sometimes it had a more urgent feel to it . But it never disappeared .
The idea of becoming a trained counselor became more of a focus for me soon after I was ordained . People would come to me as a priest with their problems , asking for advice and help . I was always a pretty good listener , but that was the only thing I could do
8 • The New Wine Press • December 2016 that seemed helpful . I would give advice , but often they had heard that same advice from others and it was not helpful . I wanted to find a way to help more , and I thought training in counseling would enable me to do that .
Around this time I happened to pick up the book The Family Crucible by Augustus Napier and Carl Whitaker . It followed a family as they did family counseling with the authors . Reading that book was a real “ aha !” moment for me . It portrayed counseling not as fixing something that was wrong with individuals , but as helping all members of the family use their gifts and strengths to change the relational dynamics that resulted in problems . That book convinced me that that was the kind of counseling ( often called Systems Theory Counseling ) I wanted to do .
An opportunity came when the provincial director , Fr . Tom Albers , asked me to be director of our college formation program at Rockhurst University . It was not at the top of my list of preferred jobs , but I said I would do it if I could pursue a Masters Degree in Counseling at the University of Missouri-Kansas City