250 Being a Doctor After Being a Patient
I think of myself as a very religious person, inwardly, deeply. But
my religion is around philosophical, mathematical, scientific con-
cepts. I am religious in the deepest sense of the term. I care about
people . . . will fight for principles. . . . But I don’t go to any church.
Helping patients gave doctors a sense of purpose and gratification,
further impelling some ill physicians to continue to practice medicine,
even as they became sicker and developed metastatic disease.
Spirituality as Involved in Health Events
Beliefs arose, too, that faith and prayer might affect the disease process
itself. Though spirituality might promote positive thinking, and hence
abet healing and coping, some believed that prayer itself could alter phys-
iology through divine intervention. Roxanne recounted, ‘‘Everyone sent
me prayer cards and Mass cards. I was in everyone’s prayers. It must have
worked: I had more energy, which never diminished.’’ Once she was sick,
she even made a religious pilgrimage to Lourdes, which she felt gave her
additional strength.
Some believed in such physiological effects, but noted colleagues’
potential antagonism toward these ideas. For example, Bradley, who
became depressed after his MI, came to believe in the power of prayer to
treat disease.
A physician-friend was extremely interested in the power of
prayer. He would just sit with patients. Some doctors wouldn’t
send him patients anymore. . . . [But] you certainly can call on things
that you might not be able to describe that make people feel better.
A few actively sought to invoke these physiological effects of spiri-
tuality by performing activities that might further these processes. Jacob
disclosed his diagnosis to people in order to get them to pray for him. He
believed their efforts worked.
I called up five people I consider very holy. They follow Jewish law,
without fanfare or publicity. I figure they’ve got God on their side.
I know it helped, because knowing they were doing it, I was
functioning better . . . I believe prayer works. That’s part of Jewish
belief: you can change the way the world is going.