RAPPORT ISSUE 5 | Page 22

RAPPORT Issue 5 (August 2020) For each student asking to see me I can't make assumptions about the reasons and there is no quick fix … Students may need much time and paying 'emotionally intelligent' attention to someone who is supposedly just having a quick word requires attention and presence, both of which may be lacking in resource-tight staff and heavy workload situations. (Portfolio 3, CS 1) The knock-on effects of running over time are absorbed by tutors wanting to do the best by their tutees: Opportunities to provide lengthy ad hoc appointment times are limited; my role doesn’t [allow] these sometimes essential meetings to take place. However, without allowing this student to 'off load' and discuss at length their concerns, they may have been at risk of leaving early'. (Portfolio 23, CS3). Unfolding understandings through conversation Conversations are important in the personal tutoring relationship; talking is good. Personal tutors recognise the benefits of talking and listening where things 'fall out' of the conversation: 'Many stories unfold through conversation' (Portfolio 3, CS 3). Conversations and the process of listening help tutees realise their problems: We talked about when his next set of assignments was due in. He replied that he didn’t know because he found it less stressful not knowing submission dates and that looking at Blackboard (virtual learning environment) was like 'looking at his bank account' (depressing and scary). I said that it was probably less stressful to have the dates than to miss them by not knowing, and he seemed to agree with me. (Portfolio 2, CS 1) In several of the case studies, conversations are deemed better than any formal referral: 'Jane was adamant that she didn’t want specialist help and just needed to talk' (Portfolio 9, CS 2), and 'Jon has refused a Learning Contract discussion and managed difficulties last year only with short extensions granted after we met a student support officer together' (Portfolio 2, CS 1). Frank conversations in the personal tutoring relationship have allowed for tutee and tutor to get things straight - something that is important for ultimately supporting students: 'I knew that in order to get under the surface and open up a more meaningful dialogue that a different tactic was needed … I then went on to say “we need to have an honest and open conversation and, for me you never look that interested in seminars, so what is going on, am I wrong?” To which she said, ‘no, you’re not wrong’, I don’t like studying’. When probed a little further, it transpired that she felt pushed into studying for her degree by her father' (Portfolio 14, CS 4). Emotional Listening Good listening can be an emotional experience, requiring energy and time. Personal tutors can often feel the strain from their tutees' worries and anxieties, as demonstrated here: Reflecting on the meeting … I was dismayed for her sake about her new disclosure … It took me quite by surprise in terms of the intensity of the interaction and the range of skills 21