Cretin And you ' ll have me to answer to , if you come within a mile of the ' Village Green with the Pump .' Pickles Who do you think you are , little man , the Bull Ferguson ? Cretin The Bull doesn ’ t frighten me . Pickles Sorry ! You must be a little bulldog . And here was me thinking you were a lap dog . Cretin Shall I have him , Marmaduke ? Want me to take him out ? Pickles I ' d rather go out with the Bull Ferguson , I just don ' t fancy you for some reason . Twaddle Leave him , Cecil . He may be the most obnoxious person in Plonkton but he has to serve drink to us . Let ’ s say he is our servant . Pickles If it wasn ' t costing Twaddle an extra penny on your pint of milk , I mean beer , I ' d have you barred ages ago . Twaddle Are you trying to tell me you charge Cecil an extra penny for his drink ? Pickles No ! I charge YOU an extra penny for his pint . Twaddle Never mind . A penny in your pocket is nothing but a penny in the pocket of Felix Wetweed . Pickles He ' s right about that ; Wetweed ' s fingers are never out of my pockets , so I didn ' t answer back . Cretin How come , Pickles , you never catch Felix Wetweed with his hand in your pocket ? Pickles How come I never catch you with your hand in your own pocket especially when it ’ s your round ? Cretin If it weren ’ t out of respect for your wishes , Marmaduke , I ' d erase that little blighter - right now ! Pickles I ' ll fight you at six-thirty , Friday , on the Village Green with the Pump , as a curtain raiser to the main event . Cretin You ' re on . Pickles And , Cecil ! Cretin What ? Pickles ‘ Don ' t bring the Bull Ferguson .’ Cretin If I needed the Bull he would be there for me . Pickles The Bull Ferguson wouldn ’ t help his granny across the road if she hadn ’ t her purse with her . Cretin I saw the Bull Ferguson kicking Sidney Slopsoup so that a bus didn ’ t run over him . Twaddle Enough Cecil ! Kicking someone ’ s head in is hardly helping them , is it ? Pickles Oh ! I don ’ t know though — in the case of Sidney Slopsoup it ’ s a borderline case . Cretin Sidney Slopsoup used to be a man of means . Pickles Sidney Slopsoup means to be a man but he he ’ s making a bad job of it .