In The LIGHT
My Heart Song
She is so beautiful… How can I relate to her? For as long as I can remember, I have been in love with her. There has been one problem, I never had the confidence to approach her. Afraid of rejection, I moved on to easier conquests. I spent time with one after another, ignoring the one that had my heart. The others always treated me well. They all worked well with me, but I knew I was not being true to my desire.
For about two decades I had a love affair with another. Her beauty could be seen immediately. She had my heart. I spent a lot of time with her. Our relationship was very strong. I could count on her at all times. If I got myself in a jam, she would always have a solution for me. My peers even acknowledged how well we got along. I was true to her, but my first love stayed in the back of my mind. I would constantly see others admiring my first love and would sometimes get jealous.
As the time went by, my desire shifted from my first love to my new love. I began to admire my first love from a distance. I let her get away, because I was too afraid to approach her. My new love and I spent many days and nights together strengthening our relationship. Things were great between us. She took me places I never thought I would be. Through her, I was introduced to many other great couples.
About five years ago, there was a great shift in my life that shook my foundation. I began a journey that forced me to question who I had become. Was I authentic? Am I who I wanted to be or should be? Is the image I portray the one intended? The answer would be…. Not Really! Although I had a happy life, I felt I should be doing more. I questioned where I had been, and where I was going. Who I had been, and who I had become? It was apparent to me that in order to reach my potential I had to make some changes.
After a lot of shifting in my life, I was faced with the relationship I was in. I realized that I still was in love with the one that got away. She was still so beautiful to me…the way she looked, her voice, her touch.. My loyalty prevented me from pursuing her, but I was so drawn. Tough decision. Everyone knew me by our relationship and expected us to be together forever. For once in my life I had to be selfish and do what was right for me. I finally got up enough nerve and broke up with her. We still love each other and forever will be friends. She even told me I could visit from time to time.
So, I sought out to find the elusive one. I would get up enough nerve to approach. To my surprise, it was easier than I thought. Almost immediately we connected. I wanted her
by Chadwick Keyser, Sr.