Ngaruawahia High School Yearbooks 2010-2012 Ngaruawahia High School Yearbook 2012 | Page 26
It is dark, darker than it has ever been within these four walls. This is a place where I should be safe, yet it has become a deep, black vortex that
can no longer protect me from this relentless fear. Echoes of shattered glass and screeching voices repeat in my head. I’m a hermit – a prisoner of
my own nightmare. There is no longer the option of escape.
Music pounds through the house and doors start to slam, screams grow deeper and more violent than ever. I hide under a single blanket, tears
pouring uncontrollably down my cheeks. I feel unable to order my thoughts.
All at once I feel heat on my face, seeping through the blanket that I hide under. Sunlight has reached my cell, and, as the chirruping of birds outside
filters through, I feel, for just a split second, that the day might be different after all. Grey reality pushes that thought aside.
I stand under the scalding shower but if I thought I could wash the pain away as easily as that I was mistaken. The water is suddenly cold, I hadn’t
even felt it cooling. How long was I under the water?
I throw on the clothes I left on the floor last night and slip downstairs, praying that nobody hears me.
A quick glance at the debris from last night is enough to bring back the memories and I turn away, trying desperately to block everything from my
mind. The kitchen crunches with broken crockery as I rummage through the cupboards for something to eat. I grab a packet of two minute noodles
and some Cheezils and get out the back door as fast as I can.
Run-down houses with peeling paint and overgrown lawns line the footpath cracked with weeds. It reminds me of that zombie apocalypse movie I
saw a couple of weeks back. Sadly, I think we don’t have to wait for the future the post-apocalypse is right here right now. I can’t shake off the
heaviness. What is the point? Day after day, this is my life, has always been my life. It is ? H??? ]x?&[H?Y?[??[?? ? ?YH ] ??YH [?H]?H]?Y??\?[? ?]\?? H??? ]H ?X???^?H \??X?? Y? H [?? ]H]?H ?]?? ?]]\?[???? ] \?H\????] [??]?^H???H] ??] H?]\?? ????H?Y[ ?Y?\??HX\? H]Y? \?[? ? ?YZ?????Y[? ? ??[ ?^\? ?Y[H ??Y[^?]YX??] ??Y][??HX\??H?? [YB?Y?? ]]?\??&] ^H ??]^?]YX??][?][??H]?HX\?? ? ? ]]?^H[?H?Y[[??????H?\? [?K?H?]?HH?? ?H??\H? [?HB????[??\??H??X\?[??X??] ?]\?\ [?[??[? Z\?]?\??\?XZ?\?YH?Y[ H[\ [?\???^H??[?H[?[??[ K?H ?X[^?H ]^B???HY?H\?[?X? ?HX?\?Y?x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x?&]?H?]?[?[?][??]?^K??H?Y[\?Y?H[H ?Y????][?? ]x?&[HX??] ??]?H[??H?Y[^\?[???X][?? ???\??]H?[??&] ??] ?H?H??? HX\??] ???Y][YH \?[?? \??\?[?H?\? ?\?] \?Y?x?&[H[??\?X?K?H[H[??\?X?K?X?]\?H??[?H????x?&[H\?K[???[?H ??[Z\??YHY?H ?\??&]\??[? ??H?[?^\?[? ?[?[?? ??\? ? H ?]?\??\?H\??? ?X\?? ]8?&\??\? ?\?H H ??Y??\?H?Y[Y? \?Y?H??[? H]?^K?^HXY\?[\ K^B??? H[[???\??&]^\? ?H?[? ?YH? H ?]\?[?????YK?HX\? H ??Y??[???^H ??\?? H?]?[ [? H ?^HH ?[??\?H ?????X]8?$? ? ? ? ? ?^H??X?\?^Y\?\?H?^Y? H ??Y[????[?H?Y[\?Y?^H?? H\?????\?Z[?K?H ?[??X] ???[?B??Y[ H ?[[Y\???\??X]Y?\??? ? ? ?H??[ ?[?Z?H \???]?\?[?H ?[? ?H ??[?]?\??] \?Y H ??[?\? ?[??HZ\?[?^HXY\? ??Y? ] ?Y? ?\?H?\? [X?[??\??[? ?x?&[H ?[?[??]?^K?X^X?H ]8?&\? ?]x?&[H?[??x?&[HX]?[????[??]?^K?^B?Z[? ???&]]YH [??X??][?H [??\? ?[?[??]?^K?H??? \?x?&\?[?H ?] [? ] ?X?]\?Hx?&]?H ?Y? ]?\?Y^HX??]??[??]?^K?X]?[??][?Z[?YK??]]?\?H [YHH]?H ]YXHH [??X??] ?]ZY? \ [?[?H?Y[]?[?[?HY??ZY ??? ?^H ?Y? ???Y][??\?????[??^HZ[?[?H??&] ?[?] ??H [?????Y ???\? H??Y?HH????H ] ]X]?\? H ??Y[?H ? [X?H?? ? H ?]?\???]?] ?Y? HXY?? ???\?H HZ\?\? ?[[??X]?H[? \?H\?HXY?[?[?? ??[???X?Y\?HX]?H ?Y[? ??YH \?H???\?\?[[???\?]?[Z[??[?H?Y[H] H?Y K?HXY???\? ? H???\? ?YH? H ?[????H H ?]?\??H??&] ?[? ? ???]H [??X??]]?[??H] H ?\??Y??H??[????H??&] ?[?[?][?? ???^H ?[??X?]\?Hx?&[H ??\?Yx?&[ ?\? [??[??[??Y[[??Y?Z[???H ?]?H ?[????[?? ][??\??\? H ?]\??]8?&\??[??H?]H??&]?Y[[? HX\??] [??H? \?? K????H\?HH?[? ?YH H[??[?? ??\?[???\??\? ] ??[H H\?Y\??[? ?\??X?H? H ?]?\??H ?[? ? ?YH [K?^H ??[?H ?? ?? ?? ???[??^H ??[ Z?HYH?\??\?]?^K?B???[?\? ?[?[?? H ?]\?x?&]?H?H]X\ ?? [Y\??Y??K?H ?[? ??\?YH[? H???\?\?? H ?]?\?] [H Z?H?\?H?YK??Y??YK??^H ??[ Z?H]?^H H Z[???H Z?H??^H ???? [?Y??H[? \??][?? ?]?\??] ? ?\?H H ??\? ??[?[? ^K??]\?H \?H\???[???]YH[? H ?]?\???]?] B?Z[?[? H?X\?H?Y[ ??Y? H?[?????[??? H ?\??X?K?HYH?X??[?Y?^H?X?H ??Y[ H ?\?]? H ?[??H?]?H^\?[? ? H ?]?\??[? ?[?] [ ?YH??H?Y[ ] \?\? ?\?HH?[????] [??H?[??XHXX?? HYX\? L???