How
to
Align
Your
“Mismatched
Libidos”
In
a
perfect
world,
you
and
your
wife
would
have
flawlessly
matched
libidos
all
the
time—but
we
both
know
that's
never
going
to
be
the
case.
You
can’t
expect
to
have
her
sex
drive
always
match
your
own.
But
if
you’re
feeling
like
you’re
being
turned
down
because
she’s
got
a
"headache"
a
little
more
frequently
than
you
should
be,
I
want
to
offer
some
practical
ideas.
After
all,
perpetual
libido
differences
can
drive
a
big
wedge
between
a
husband
and
wife.
So
for
the
sake
of
your
marriage,
as
well
as
our
sex
life,
it’s
essential
to
keep
that
to
a
minimum.
The
following
are
proven
suggestions
for
putting
your
two
sex-‐drives
in
the
same
gear.
Let Go of the Myth
It’s
true
-‐
you
find
what
you’re
looking
for.
If
you
want
evidence
to
indicate
that
your
wife
doesn’t
want
sex
as
much
as
you
do,
you’ll
find
plenty
of
it.
But
if
you’re
ready
to
equal
the
scales
of
sexual
desire,
you’ve
got
to
get
over
this
common
male
myth
by
seeing
her
in
a
new
light.
One
of
the
best
ways
to
do
this
is
by
putting
an
end
to
snide
comments
or
innuendos
that
highlight
a
perceived
libido
difference.
Every
time
you
say
something,
even
under
your
breath,
like,
“well
if
we
ever
had
sex
…,”
you’re
driving
a
sexual
wedge
between
you.
By
the
way,
this
means
not
only
forgoing
these
comments
with
her,
but
when
you’re
out
with
the
boys
as
well.
Set
your
mind
to
seeing
your
wife
on
the
same
side
with
you.
She
wants
to
have
a
great
sex
life
as
much
as
you
do.
And
if
you
don’t
believe
me,
just
ask
her.
Discuss Your Sex Drives
When
was
the
last
time
you
talked
with
your
wife
about
her
sex
drive?
It’s
not
a
common
conversation
for
most
couples.
Yet
it’s
critically
important
for
getting
your
libidos
to
line
up.
When
the
time
is
right,
when
both
of
you
are
relatively
relaxed
and
not
distracted,
ask
her
when
she
feels
most
frisky?
Her
answer
may
surprise
you.
I
have
a
friend
who
told
me
he
recently
discovered
that
his
wife
found
him
most
sexy
when
he
wore
a
suit.
He
joked
about
wearing
it
to
bed.
The
point
is
that
you
need
to
know
as
much
as
you
can
about
her
sexual
desires.
Ask
her
about
the
time
of
day,
as
well
as
the
time
of
month,
she
is
most
inclined
to
want
to
have
sex.
Ask
her
what
would
make
it
easier
or
more
fun
for
her.
Make
Initiations
Easier
One
of
the
things
I
hear
from
women
who
are
in
couple’s
counseling
for
this
issue
is
that
they
don’t
like
to
be
the
one
initiating
sex.
Some
women
are
simply
uncomfortable
with
saying,
“Would
you
like
to
make
love?”
If
you’re
married
to
a
woman
like
this,
you’ve
no
doubt
attributed
her
shyness
in
this
area
to
a
lack
of
libido.
But
that’s
a
mistake.
Instead,
make
it
easier
for
her
to
initiate
sex
with
you.
Find
a
sign
or
a
signal
that
will
make
this
almost
effortless
for
her.
For
example,
it
may
be
that
there’s
a
candle
she
could
light,
or
a
particular
song
she
could
play,
or
a
look
she
could
give
that
would
be
her
signal
that
she’d
like
to
have
sex.
You
get
the
idea.
So
don’t
waste
time.
Talk
to
her
about
what
could
be
used
to
make
the
her
initiations
easier.