MamaMagic Milestones Winter 2014 | Page 55

Extend the compliments and say: “Now we have 2 beautiful children!” Around other people Warn uninitiated friends that your toddler may get jealous, so ask them to make a fuss over him as well as the new baby when they visit. Some friends may also bring a gift for the baby, but forget about your toddler. Have some spare gifts in the cupboard as back up. Let your toddler unwrap baby’s gifts, so he is involved in the baby in a fun way. (This also starts teaching him about giving, and not only taking – an important life lesson.) When people comment on how beautiful your new baby is in front of your toddler, extend the compliments to him too. For example, you could say: “Now we have 2 beautiful children!” Feeling special You need to make sure your toddler still feels special, so that he doesn’t feel he has to compete with the baby for your affection. You can do this by highlighting his talents, so he is reassured of his individuality. You could tell him, for example, he is great at throwing and kicking balls, and one day he will be able to play ball with his little sister and teach her his skills. Importantly, try to set aside a little 1 on 1 time for your toddler each day, even if it is only 15 minutes. Behaviour changes Be prepared for your toddler to start acting out, and even regressing into old behaviours such as using a dummy. Be patient and accepting of these changes. Let him have his dummy. At the same time, start to draw his attention to the benefits of being older and bigger than the baby – that he can eat ice cream and play on the jungle gym, for example, things which his little sister can’t do. Be sympathetic. Tell your toddler you know it is hard for him to have to adjust to a new baby, so he is reassured that he can express all of his emotions, both positive and negative. By being sensitive to how big an impact a new baby is on your toddler, he should be able to adapt quickly, and soon he will be loving his new sibling. Good luck!