Life Designer, March 2015
Manners Etiquette
Utensils
The utensils that you will be using should be on the
table. In the case of a very formal dinner, some of the
flatware may be added or replaced with each course.
Forks are placed on the left with the napkin and bread
and butter plate. Knives and spoons are on the right
with the glasses. Utensils are used from the outside in.
Never place used silverware back on the table.
Do not leave spoons in a cup; place on a saucer.
If a piece of silverware falls on the floor, simply scoot
it under the table. Ask the server or the host to bring
you another one.
Never wave your fork or knife around or use as props.
Napkins
There are signals for removing the
napkin from the table. One way is
after the host does so.
If there is no host at the table, wait
until everyone at the table has been
seated to place your napkin on your
lap.
In fine restaurants, the server will
usually take the napkin from the table
and place it in your lap for you.
Place the napkin folded in half
(with the crease closest to your waist) in your lap.
For ladies, if you are concerned about your lipstick
coming off on your napkin, blot it with a tissue before
you come to the table. Lipstick on napkins or glasses is
most unattractive.
If you need to excuse yourself from the table, do so
between courses. Simply excuse yourself and leave
your napkin on the seat of your chair to indicate to the
server that you will be returning. Never ball up a
napkin.
When the meal is over, the host will place the folded
napkin on the table. If there is no host, wait until
everyone has finished and then put your napkin to the
left of your place setting. The most appropriate time to
do this is as everyone is rising from the table.
Avoid placing napkins on clean or dirty plates. Place
the folded (dirty) napkin to the left of your place
setting when the meal is complete.
If you must blow your nose, please excuse yourself
from the table; do not use the napkin—it is not a
handkerchief.
Service
Food is served from the left.
Food and beverage is Refilled, Removed and
Replenished from the right.
You do not need to thank the server for each course
they bring out.
5
It is appropriate to move and interact with servers in
order to make serving easier.
Food & Beverage Selection
It is best to order foods that can be eaten with a fork
and knife. Finger foods can be messy.
Avoid ordering foods you are not familiar with.
If you have allergies or food restrictions, it is
acceptable to ask how the food is prepared and to make
a special request in advance.
If you are attending a large function where the meal is
pre-ordered, inquire about the menu or tell the person
issuing the invitation that you have special needs. In a
pre-ordered meal, alcoholic beverages may be have
already
been ordered and you may not order
separately.
Eating
Wait for the host/hostess to pick up
their fork before you start to eat. If
there is a custom to say a prayer
before eating, you will not be
embarrassed.
If there is not a host/hostess,
wait until everyone has been
served before you begin.
At large tables that seat 8 or 10,
the wait staff may have difficulty
serving everyone at the same
time. It is considerate of those
who are waiting for their food to encourage the
other to start while their food is warm.
If you are seated at a round table of 6-10, wait until all
have been served before you begin eating.
If you are seated at a long banquet table, begin eating
when at least 3 people on either side of you have been
served.
If you are served foods that you cannot eat, eat what
you can on the plate and leave the rest. Same goes for
foods you do not care for.
Never share foods or eat off someone else’s plate.
Remember that business meals are not about the food
— they are about business first.
Pace your eating. Pay attention to how fast or slow the
other diners are eating so you do not finish way ahead
of them or lag behind.
Never ask for a doggy bag.
Do not smoke at the table.
Do not speak with food in your mouth.
Never chew with your mouth open.
Do not make loud noises when you eat.
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