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couples, especially older
pairs who've been together
a long time, are perfectly
fine with once or twice a
year or even not at all,
thank you very much. Not
having sex doesn't mean
these couples aren't deeply
in love, monogamously
committed and happy
together. It just means that
sex isn't as high a priority
for them as it is for some
of their friends, neighbors
or people they see on TV
and in the movies.
That said, many couples
do find infrequent sex to
be an issue. In fact,
numerousstudies have
shown that lack of sex
corresponds directly with
marital instability and
thoughts of leaving a
relationship. Sometimes
one person's sex drive just
doesn't match his or her
partner's sex drive. This
JOY FEELINGS MAGAZINE
issue often arises in
couples counseling.
Sometimes both partners
want to be sexual, but one
(or both) is not interested
in sex with his or her
spouse. This can be
caused by any number of
factors, including
lingering resentments,
lack of emotional
intimacy, diminished
physical attraction,
differing sexual interests,
etc. Lack of sexual interest
may also be the result of
an underlying
psychological condition
such as depression,
anxiety, drug or alcohol
addiction, a behavioral
addiction, low self-esteem,
unresolved childhood
trauma, an attachment
deficit disorder, etc. And
there is always the
possibility that one partner
may be having an affair.