HEALTH + WELLNESS
First things first , you ’ re going to need to channel your inner Zen . You may think karma ’ s a load of claptrap , and perhaps manifesting your intentions by way of a mood board isn ’ t for you , but … Zen – a Japanese school of thought that emphasises the value of meditation and intuition over ritual worship or study of scriptures – is more about rethinking your state of mind to stay more in control of your mental and physical health . It ’ s easier than you think to channel your inner Zen ; we ’ ve all got it happily lurking somewhere , and there ’ s no harm in adopting simple strategies to deal with life ’ s stresses , so we ’ ve put together a few pointers to help you be the most peaceful version of yourself .
RESOLVE CONFLICT
Conflict within relationships – be that with your partner , a friend , or a stroppy teenage child – is inevitable for most people and can be a huge source of stress , albeit a fleeting and infrequent one . How you view conflict , however , plays a huge role in how you let it affect you . If you view it as wholly detrimental , it ’ s more likely to become a self-fulfilling prophecy , but if you flip that and view it as a necessary , even positive step towards development in a relationship , when resolved it ’ ll serve to enhance your awareness of one another and reinforce your bond . Try and think through why the conflict has elicited such strong emotions before you attempt to work it out and the outcome will be a far healthier one .
LET IT GO
When you hold a grudge , your body ( as well as your mind ) actually holds the grudge , which can lead to physical symptoms like panic attacks and an unsettled stomach . Forgiveness isn ’ t the easiest thing in the world , but holding a grudge is pointless too and will just cause you more stress in the long term . Letting go of any anger or negativity that you associate with a person or situation frees you up mentally to work out whether you want to try and resolve the issues that have occurred , or just walk away – letting go doesn ’ t mean you have to be best buds with someone who ’ s hurt or hugely offended you , but it does mean giving yourself a break from the burden .
BE MINDFUL
A mind-body approach used to help shake off any stressful thoughts and feelings , mindfulness involves paying greater attention to the present moment through awareness of your thoughts , emotions and senses , the theory being that the more you ’ re aware of them , the better you can manage them and prevent becoming overwhelmed . If you catch yourself getting worked up about something that happened in the past or that you ’ re worried might happen in the future , try bringing yourself back into the present moment by using sound , sight and touch . Steady your breathing rate while listening to something you can hear , be that a clock or the traffic outside ; something you can see like a picture hanging on the wall ; and something you can touch – your sleeve , or the rug under your feet . You ’ ll be calmer and more focused in no time .
Feeling relaxed and more determined to wave goodbye to any negative encounters you may have experienced last year ? Good . Now it ’ s time to think specifically about YOU .
WORK
No matter how much you love ( or dislike ) your work , if you spend more time thinking about your job than anything else then you have your priorities in the wrong order . In the battle of time to relish your children simply being children , or sitting down for an uninterrupted dinner with your partner a couple of times a week over making more money , or achieving ‘ success ’, quality time will always win . Remind yourself that family comes first and then do something to physically prove that point , which can start off as simply as coming home early one night a week .
Leave your work at work and , unless it ’ s a bona fide emergency , stop taking business calls , or responding to work emails outside of working hours . Better still , leave your phone out of earshot once you ’ re at home , so you can keep your attention elsewhere – this is a big ask , but if the thought of it causes you anxiety , that ’ s a sure fire sign of imbalance . At the very least , put your phone on silent , check it if you must and build up a resistance from there .
In work and in life overall , it ’ s important to grasp the ‘ yin yang ’ of it all – success and apparent failure is all part of achieving balance and most of us likely have a bit of both in our lives , but only focus on one . If you are someone who naturally gives yourself a hard time when comparing yourself to your colleagues , shift that mindset to recognise where you ’ ve succeeded . If you can work out what you ’ re afraid of and why this makes you focus on the negative instead of the positive , you can then find ways to better yourself in the area that you think you ’ re lacking in .
21st-century women have a pretty strong and positive identity when compared to their counterparts from years gone by , but , according to psychology , adult women still struggle with low self-esteem and ambivalence at work becoming frustrated and impatient when developments in their careers don ’ t happen exactly as they imagined . Which is where finding the balance between diligence and passion , and being open to alternative opportunities comes in . Say yes more at work – if an opportunity is presented to you that isn ’ t what you originally had in mind , be brave and grab it .
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