Voices
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It isn’t that your experiences
can’t be a valid contribution to the
conversation, but instead of a “my
pain is more painful than your
pain” approach, instead, try sympathizing. Why not try using your
experience as a new parent to help
instead of compete? Say something like, “Whoa! I bet you’re
tired. When I was tired after my
daughter was born, I found that
pouring coffee directly into my
eyeballs was incredibly useful.”
3. ‘DON’T WORRY, WHEN YOU HAVE
KIDS YOU’LL...’
... not be grossed out by boogers,
know who Dora the Explorer is,
be happy... UGH. We’ve got to quit
assuming that everyone is going to
have kids. Some people don’t want
kids and choose not to have them.
Some people really want kids and
are trying incredibly hard to have
them. Indicating to these people
that having kids is the only way
they will reach some higher level of
understanding is both inconsiderate and rude. I don’t know what
the alternatives to these statements are. Maybe just cut anything
that starts with “When you have
kids...” out of your repertoire all
together. It makes you sound like
someone’s mom, anyway.
JOHN
KINNEAR
HUFFINGTON
07.28.13
‘Oh man, you think your
feet hurt from working outside
all day! I’ve been chasing my
toddler blah blah blah punch
me in the face, please.’”
4. ‘IS THE PARTY KID-FRIENDLY?’
Unless you and your friend have
some previous communication on
this topic about how your little
one is always welcome, assume
the party is not kid-friendly. Don’t
ask. If it were “kid-friendly” they
would have invited you AND your
kids, and mentioned the awesome
playroom that they will have set
up in the basement. By asking
your non-kid-having friends if
their party is kid friendly you are
putting them in the really awkward position of either MAKING
their party kid-friendly on the
fly, or telling you that the party
is NOT kid-friendly which, then,
no matter how low-key the party