How to Coach Yourself and Others Popular Models for Coaching | Page 143
You can make an ABC exercise really short;
A. (Activating situation) Drunks walking past outside, making
some noise.
B. (irrational Belief (or IB)I have about A) They SHOULD NOT
make any noise.
C. (Consequences of having those beliefs about A) I feel
angry, etc.
D. (Dispute the irrational Belief/s in B) WHY should not they
make any noise?
E. (Effective new thinking) Drunk people do make noise, it is
what they are good at- it is like a natural talent for them. I
will CHOOSE not to upset myself about this.
In addition, you can do this on many situations that bother you
and reclaim your peace of mind, just look for the DEMAND and
turn it into a PREFERENCE.
Here is another one...
A. (Activating situation) I tried to do something and failed
B. (irrational Belief I have about A) I must always be
successful
C. (Consequences of believing B) I feel bad, depressed, etc.
D. (Dispute the Irrational Belief in B) Where is it written in
stone that I must I always be successful?
E. (Effective new thinking to replace B) I would prefer
always to be successful but let us be realistic- that isn't very
likely, is it- I am human and humans are fallible, therefore do
not succeed in everything they attempt. If success is
important, then I will work harder recognizing that failure
may occur again.
That's it- that is how to do ABC's. Try this technique with
something that is bothering you. Try to keep it as simple as you
can while you get used to the ideas involved.
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