How to Coach Yourself and Others Essential Knowledge For Coaching | Page 157
The following are tips for dealing with difficult people who
are in your life, for better or for worse:
1.
Keep Conversations Neutral Avoid discussing divisive and
personal issues, like religion and politics, or other issues
that tend to cause conflict. If the other person tries to
engage you in a discussion that will probably become an
argument, change the subject or leave the room.
2.
Accept The Reality of Who They Are In dealing with
difficult people, don’t try to change the other person; you
will only get into a power struggle, cause defensiveness,
invite criticism, or otherwise make things worse. It also
makes you a more difficult person to deal with.
3.
Know What's Under Your Control Change your response to
the other person; this is all you have the power to change.
For example, don’t feel you need to accept abusive behavior.
You can use assertive communication to draw boundaries
when the other person chooses to treat you in an
unacceptable way.
4.
Create Healthier Patterns Remember that most
relationship difficulties are due to a dynamic between two
people rather than one person being unilaterally "bad."
Chances are good that you're repeating the same patterns of
interaction over and over; changing your response could get
you out of this rut, and responding in a healthy way can
improve your chances of a healthier pattern forming. Here’s
a list of things to avoid in dealing with conflict. Do you do
any of them? Also, here are some healthy communication
skills to remember.
5.
See The Best In People Try to look for the positive aspects
of others, especially when dealing with family, and focus on
them. (Developing your optimism and reframin skills can
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