How to Coach Yourself and Others Empowering Coaching And Crisis Interventions | Page 120

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Different options to repeat a message are available:
1.

Parroting : literally echo their exact words. Often, only the last words are repeated (mirror-questions) in an
invitation to amplify on them. The use of parroting should however be limited, since hearing your own
words echoed repeatedly soon becomes very annoying.

2.

Repeating Content: This technique goes beyond parroting: The individual’s exact words are repeated,
inviting them to elaborate on their story or to continue it.

3.

Repeating Conflict: Repeat both sides of a conflict situation, opposing pros and cons stimulate them to make
a considered choice.

4.

Paraphrasing or Reflecting Meaning: Repeating the individual’s message in your own words, that is:
reflecting the facts or ideas, but not the emotions and without getting emotionally involved, may open new
perspectives. Often an element of acknowledgement or positive feedback will be part of the paraphrasing,
thus motivating the other to continue sharing.

Paraphrasing
Paraphrasing expresses interest and focuses on the individual and his/her problem. By actively seeking clarity, you
achieve a shared meaning, avoid misunderstanding, and gain the trust of the person with whom you are speaking.
Paraphrasing includes several elements. Repeating the intent or content of what the person has stated is very helpful
in making sure that the responder understands the meaning of the words the person is using. Most people do this
when communicating on a regular basis.
Take this brief example:
- A woman walks into her house after being at work all day. "Boy, what a rough one!" she says.
- Her daughter asks, "You had a bad day?"
- The woman responds by s