How to Coach Yourself and Others Beware of Manipulation | Page 41

(7) Declarations of dependency:
“You don’t understand how much I need you (depend, trust, etc).” This may be followed by “and how
little you care what happens to me.”
(8) Declarations of reverse dependency:
“You don’t understand how much you need me (depend, trust, etc).” This may be followed by “and
how much I care what happens to you.”
(9) The “Let me show you how to do it” ploy.
This makes others realize they do not have the time, talent or temperament to accomplish something,
thereby shaming them into letting the practitioner volunteer to do the job.
(10) The “Show me how to do it” ploy.
This makes others realize the practitioner does not have the time, talent or temperament to accomplish
something, thereby shaming them into volunteering to do the job.
(11) The “I tried to cover for your mistake” routine, “and it:”
(a) Worked, so you’ve got to repay the favor by doing something for me.
(b) Didn’t work, so you’ve got to do something to fix the problem.
(12) The “I tried to teach you, but you won’t listen to me, so don’t ask me any more questions” ploy.
This ploy is to punish others by instilling a deep sense of loss created by withdrawal of the
practitioners (opinionated) “wise counsel.”
(13) Insults directed at others to further distance the practitioner, who by now knows they have failed
in their efforts to dominate.
(14) Polarizing groups of people into adverse parties.
This is further punishment for failure to recognize the superiority of the practitioner and an attempt to
establish control by comparing persons to create competition.
(15) Withdrawal, when suggestions, comments or questions come up about their pronouncements, with
simulated:
(a) Hurt
(b) Rejection
(c) Depression
(d) Physical sickness
(e) Protests of innocence
(f) Accusations of others
(16) False remorse
With hypocritical statements of now perceiving how their past activities have hurt others and a seeking
of forgiveness for past behavior.

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