imagine that what you are anxious about has already happened and gone much better than expected . The important thing is just to do or think something different . Don ' t be passively carried along by the current of the mood . The quickest way to do this may be to simply imagine not feeling the way you are feeling . So if I ' m feeling hacked off , I might close my eyes and take a few moments to strongly imagine feeling relaxed and comfortable and even in a good mood . This will , at the very least , neutralise the bad mood and may even put you in a good mood .
4 ) Observe how others deal effectively with their emotions
We can learn so much from other people ( as long as we look to the right people to learn from !). How do other ' emotionally skilled ' people deal with their frustrations and difficulties ? You could even ask them : " How do you keep so cool when you ' re presenting to all these people ? Why doesn ' t that make you angry ? How do you keep smiling after such setbacks ?" Their answers could actually change your life if you start to apply what you learn .
5 ) Change your physiology
Some people assume that emotions are ' all in your head ', whereas actually all emotions are physical responses . Anger pushes heart rate and blood pressure up , which is why having an angry temperament is a predictor of heart disease ( 2 ) ; anxiety produces lots of physical changes ; and even depression suppresses the immune system ( 3 ) . So part of changing your emotional state involves dealing directly with the physical changes . Physical changes are led by the way we breathe . For instance , anger and anxiety can only ' work ' if we are breathing quicker with shallow breaths . Take time to :
• Stop breathing for five seconds ( to ' reset ' your breath ).
• Now breathe in slowly , focussing on your diaphragm , until your lungs are full of air .
• Then breathe out even more slowly ( and whilst doing this , imagine that you are breathing pure rest and relaxation into your hands ).
• Keep doing this and remember it ' s the out-breath that will calm everything down .