Healing and Hypnotherapy Volume - 4, issue 9 1 March 2020 | Page 13

9
They think literally and talk only about ‘what’ (what they saw, what
happened) but can’t talk about deeper topics (like ‘why’ this happened,
why I felt …)
10 They crave exclusive attention (like children) and aren’t interested in
mutual/reciprocal conversations
11 They don’t try to understand your emotions and even take pride in
being insensitive (e.g., “I’m just saying it like it is,” “I can’t change who I
am” etc.)
12 They communicate their emotions through emotional contagion and
upset everyone around them (similar to what young children do)
13 They don’t say sorry or try to repair relationships
14 They expect you to mirror them 
15 They enforce strict roles and encourage toxically enmeshed family
dynamics, rejecting individuality and boundaries
16 They feel entitled to do what they like simply because they’re the
“parent” and you’re the “child”
17 They play favourites 
18 Their self-esteem rides on you giving them what they want or you acting
in a way they think you should
19 They shame you and show contempt for who you authentically are and
how you genuinely feel
How many of these signs did you say “yes” to?
Are Emotionally Immature Parents Also Narcissists?
4 Types of Emotionally Immature Parents
Usually, emotionally immature parents fit into four different types (that often
overlap), as defined by clinical psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson. These are:
1. Emotional Parents  
Characteristics: Ruled by their emotions. Swing from over-involvement to
sudden withdrawal. Tend to be unnervingly unstable and unpredictable.
Perceive other people as their rescuers or abandoners. Often overwhelmed
by anxiety and depend on others to ground them. Treat small upsets as the
end of the world.
2. Driven Parents 
Characteristics: Extremely busy and compulsively goal-oriented. Controlling
and interfering. Have excessively high expectations. Try to perfect everything,
including their children. Use work as a way of avoiding reality and emotions.