Healing and Hypnotherapy Volume 4 Issue- 10, 1 April 2020 | Page 14

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Increased love, acceptance, and compassion for others
Improved relationships
Improved friendships
Improved work life
More authentic connections with people
Enhanced joy and gratitude for life
Increased playfulness, creativity, and spontaneity
More self-trust
Healthier and wiser choices
Increased access to new opportunities
Improved mental health (and less anxiety + depression)
Deeper access to one’s soul and spiritual path
I could probably go on for another few pages. But these are the most
immediate benefits that come to mind.
Why is it So Damn Hard For Us to Love Ourselves?
The short answer is that we were raised in a society (and likely a family) that
didn’t teach us about self-love.
All throughout our early lives, we were taught how to read, write, calculate,
build, theorise, study and analyse life. We were taught how to say “please”
and “thank you,” as well as what was acceptable and unacceptable to others
and society at large … but most of us failed to be educated in one essential
dimension of life: self-love.
Something that continues to shock me about my own upbringing was the
distinct lack of emphasis on respect for oneself and acceptance of one’s flaws
and virtues alike. As a child I can’t ever recall being taught the value of loving
oneself; of setting healthy boundaries, knowing how to say “no” and “yes”
when you mean it, and learning how to take care of yourself, even at the
expense of others.
If you were raised in a culture and society similar to my own, you were
probably taught to “put others before yourself” and not give much
consideration to your own needs. Self-denial and self-sacrifice were two of
the main values taught in our childhoods, and continue to be emphasised as
the markers of a “kind, caring and worthy human being” to this very day.
Unfortunately, as I learned later in life, these two values taught me nothing
more than the profound emotional and psychological pain of being a self
imposed martyr with no real understanding of how to take care of myself – or
others for that matter.