better” or “you didn’t deserve this treatment”. Giving the inner child
permission to release feelings of responsibility for something out of his
control can be a big relief. In addition, there are times when the client is
guided to join the child in the experience so that he may respond or act with
the adult wisdom for a more favourable outcome.
For clients who have achieved some success in their lives, whether through
marriage and family or career, I often guide the client to share with the child
that those childhood experiences were a catalysts for success. This often
pleases the inner child, bringing a sensation that the painful experience
was somehow purposeful.
Once the inner child achieves adult understanding, it may be appropriate
for the client to address the offending parties from the inner child’s
perspective. Communicating how the client felt at the time of the event or
experience gives voice to the voiceless. For those experiencing
depression, this can be quite powerful indeed. Forgiveness can be
achieved if the client is ready and willing.
After adult level awareness is achieved, I then invite the client to completely
free the inner child from the experience. This step is one of imagination,
and from my experience, very welcomed by clients. The client can choose
to allow their inner child to run free, to be a child and laugh and be joyful
(clients often imagining running free in a park or meadow with other
children, feeling safe and secure). Another option is for the client to allow
the inner child to integrate into his adult heart where he will be safe, loved
and nurtured. In this second option, I let the client know that the child will
teach him to be more joyful, spontaneous and creative. No matter the
choice, a few minutes are given to allow the client to ‘feel’ this experience.
It is truly powerful moment to witness.
As the client is gently guided back to the present moment, you will often
see a lighter, freer expression in the client’s face. I often find in the
following session that numerous improvements have been experienced in
the client’s daily life as a result of the inner child work. As there may be
multiple issues formed in early childhood, I often perform regression at
other sessions until the client achieves his goal.
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