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Harmony in Marriage
the fault of the person who is hurt by it. All these (people) are
walls as such. All conflicts are like bumping into a wall. When
you bump into a wall you do not at who is at fault do you? You
don’t try to prove that you were right, do you?
You must think of everyone that clashes with you, as
being a wall. Look for the door, so even in the darkness you
will be able to find your way out. You need to make it a rule
not to clash with anyone.
[10] TWO SEPARATE DEPARTMENTS
Men should not interfere in women’s affairs and women
should not interfere with men’s affairs. Each should stay within
his or her departments.
Questioner : What is a woman’s department? What
matters should men not interfere in?
Dadashri : Cooking and running the household is a
woman’s department. It is not necessary for the husband to
know where she buys her groceries and her grains. If she tells
you she is having problems trying to get some grains, then it is
a different matter. Is there any need to interfere in her
department when she does not ask for your help? There is no
need to tell her what to cook either. When the time comes, your
meal will be served. Her department is her territory. If some
day you have an intense desire to eat something, then you can
ask her to cook it for you. I am not telling you that you cannot
say anything, however when you complain about things as trivial
as the soup being too salty, you are interfering in her
department.
A good husband will not interfere in the domestic affairs
of his wife. If he does, he is like a woman. There are some men
who go into the kitchen and check the spice containers to see
how much have been used up in the last two months. You fool,