Harmony in Marriage
11
degree to which her ego is intoxicated. The power she will
exercise will be in proportion to the degree of intoxication.
Questioner : That is true. Similarly should we do the
same when the men use their power unnecessarily?
Dadashri : That is when you have to exercise the same
care. “Hmm, today he seems to be in a scolding mood….” You
can tell yourself this in your mind, but do not say anything to his
face.
Questioner : Yes, otherwise it will add fuel to the fire.
Dadashri : “There was a big blow up today,” they will
say. Things should not be this way. How beautiful a friendship
can be between two friends! Can two friends behave in this
manner? Would they still remain friends if they acted in this
manner? Husband and wife are considered friends. Therefore
they have to run their home like two friends would. You should
not create problems. Is this why parents get their daughters
married? Do they give their daughters to you so that you can
behave in this manner? Is this behaviour becoming of you?
What do you think? It does not suit us. Who do you call
civilized? Is it the ones who have conflicts at home or the ones
who have none?
There should not be even a single quarrel in the home,
but if it happens to occur, you should solve it. As soon as you
think the flames are going to ignite, throw water on it and cool
it down. What is the advantage of living a life of quarrels? What
is the meaning of it? There should be no quarrelling in life. What
are you going to divide and take with you when you die? Why
have quarrels when you have to eat and sleep together? You get
upset when someone says anything negative about your
husband, but you do not have any problems when you do the
same. It should not be this way. Even the husband should not