Melodramaa
I Dared ............................................................. Q4/Prose
I Dared narrates the story of a girl that is brave enough to enter the aquatic world. The idea from this piece came after Spring Break 2017. The teacher told us to write a new creative piece about our vacations. I decided to write my piece about my vacations in Puerto Vallarta and my adventures in the ocean. This piece evolved a lot with peer feedback. After a paper pass in class, my piece received a lot of suggestions, which I did pay attention to and included them to improve the piece. Some examples of what I added to the new version of my piece includes descriptions about the mermaids, the animals, and the sea; phrases about Poseidon’s myth and what the grandfather of the character told her. These changes affected the piece in a positive way because it made it more illustrative, forcing the reader to feel the actions. In general, I feel fulfilled and pleased with my accomplishments. I think I did I great job with the creative process, from drafting all the way to the final piece. I believe this is one of my strongest pieces I have done in quarter four because I was able of using something I experience and convert it into a creative short story. A quotation that shows a strength is the following, “Their algae hairs were long enough to cover up my entire body, and their faces blurred with the reflection of the sunrays on the crystalline water. My eyes could barely perceive their limbs, it seemed as if their fingers were connected by a thin layer of skin and their legs were conjoined into a holographic fin that reflected a blinding brightness.” I think in this quotation, I was capable of mastering the art of description. A specific weakness of this piece is the fact that I rushed the ending, in other words, the final part of the short story sounds forced. For further improvement, I could add more events that could have led to the ending, which could
make it sound better.
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