Raise a glass of champagne or brandy to your brick
Draw a smiley face on a brick
Dress it up with a ski hat and sunglasses
Cradle it in your arms as though it were an infant
Test airport security by putting a brick in your carry-on bag
Keep your brick in your sewing basket so you'll always be able to find it
Paint a brick black to remind you of the night
Paint a brick orange to remind you of a word that's difficult to rhyme
Move it to your aquarium so you can keep an eye on it
Tape a brick to the ceiling to test the adhesive strength of duct tape
Get accidentally conked on the head
Place a brick in your garden as a stepping stone
Elevate your computer monitor
Name your brick
Weigh it
Develop an IQ test for a brick
Measure your brick
Calculate your brick's density
Crack open a few recalcitrant pistachios
Groom your pet brick
Stare at it long enough to imagine a world without bricks
"I'm All Right (only a flesh wound)"
by Aaron Thomas Leonard Piccirillo
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