The Physical
It’s been proven that women generally stray for emotional reasons, such as wanting more attention, affection, compliments etc. Not to say that men don’t want those things as well, but as mentioned in my October 2015 FLM article “What Men Really Think Makes A Woman’s Body Sexy”, men are very visual. Most men act on what visually appeals to them and most of the time if they’re unfaithful it will be with someone that has an incredible amount of physical attraction. A major reason why a guy may make a huge lapse in judgment with a beautiful stranger outside of his relationship is when he feels less attracted to his woman. Many men surveyed noted that the relationship changes when a woman stops caring about their physical appearance. We all have witnessed the fiancée (both male and female) working out vigorously to get into shape before the wedding. But soon after the honeymoon the workouts stop, weight is back on and the pounds only continue to increase throughout the years. Soon your mate is 30lbs heavier and content with where they are with no immediate plans to improve their health or appearance. This could lead to less intimacy in the bedroom and more complacency. Although this happens to just as many men as women, women are less likely to use this as a reason to stray. Men on the other hand, are more prone to react to that stunner that they just met during a business meeting that has a bangin’ body. The odds of this happening increases with the physically fit guy that lives in the gym. While he’s burning 1200 calories at the gym, his concern is his wife devouring a bag of chips at home. A great saying is “Those couples that work out together make out forever.”
The Chase
It’s a fact that most men are hunters by nature. Since the cavemen days’ men have notably been the ones to hunt for food to provide for their families. But cavemen also hunted for their women, with the strongest of men usually being more successful. (And women LOVE strong and powerful men, but we’ll save that for another story!). Things really have not changed, but has just become more sophisticated. Today we have social media, dating sites, and apps like Tinder that expose us to more potential mates. But men are still on the hunt, which I like to call “the chase”. We love the chase and the thrill of victory after the chase has been conquered. However, for some men, the chase is addictive. It just doesn’t stop. They chase one person after the next and once that chase is over another one starts. It continues because it’s exhilarating to them. Women, think of it as going to buy a new pair of shoes every week. Jimmy Choo shoes! The anticipation excites you and the purchase is gratifying. But after you’ve worn them a few times, the nostalgia wears off and you’re in search of your next pair. I’m not suggesting that women are like a new pair of Christian Louboutin’s, but only trying to compare the feeling.
Some men in committed relationships just want to know that they still got it. They may chase someone that’s interesting to them, but once they’ve conquered they keep it moving. Some guys may even stop from going any further and won’t entertain an outside relationship if they feel they’ve accomplished what they set out to do, which is to gain the attention of the other person…” the challenge”. However, for this type of guy, he’s only as good as his last chase. He loves a woman that plays hard to get or is hard to get. The bigger the challenge, the bigger the thrill. Unfortunately, once a guy is addicted to the chase he may never have the ability to overcome his desire without a little help from a therapist. I may have a friend or two that I can refer him to.