Faith Filled Family 2015 Issue 2 | Page 27

temptation is never far away. Rejection creates feelings of low self-worth as a man wonders why his wife no longer wants to have sex. He mentally deems her “frigid” without perhaps trying to understand the reason behind her hesitation. Temptation never begins in the form of an affair, but can lead to one. Just as a woman needs to talk to her mate to feel intimate, a man needs sex to feel that connection to his wife. Most feelings of rejection spiral into selfgratification and pornography, which are serious addictions unto themselves. Men get to a point where it physically hurts not to get a release and end up gratifying themselves. However, men are visual creatures, so they need some type of stimulation to get them aroused. That is where the sin and deception come in. Masturbation is self-indulgence. Men, when they self gratify, are taking something that was meant for their wives and satisfying themselves. The Bible never directly speaks against self-gratification, but it does cover sexual sin. The sin isn’t in the release, but the images that lead up to the release. “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” Hebrews 13:4 How do you get to be an adulterer? Look no further than Matthew and Job: “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Matthew 5:28 The sin begins long before self-gratification. It is in the lustful images and desires they create towards someone that isn’t your spouse. Most men wouldn’t dream of telling their wives that they fantasize about someone else while having sex with them. Yet this is what pornography leads to. While most men will stop at pornography, some will go on to have affairs. The seed has already been sown and often bitterness begins to take root. It can begin with that flirtatious girl in the office with the slightly revealing clothing, sexual innuendos gone too far, or even cyber sex. Affairs are more due to unmet needs than just sex, although sometimes it stems from the pain of rejection over sex. I don’t think that there is any woman out there th