Lifestyle
The psychology of love
We all have our preferences on who we find attractive and who we don't. Whether they're a celebrity of someone we eyed up in a bar, how come we are attracted to some people and not others?
According to psychology there are numerous explanations and theories proposed as to why we are drawn to certain people. Some may think their preferences are influened by the people they hang around with or who their families approve of, but psychology offers a vast array of different explanations.
One of the most popular theories is that of Walster et al, who in the 1990s, came up with the concept of the 'Matching Hypothesis'. According to Walster et al. we base our preferences on ur own phsyical attractiveness. Someone who is attractive is likely to be drawn to someone of a similar attractiveness to themself. If couples are mismatches this can of course cause problem in the relationship. For example someone who believes their partner could do much better than them is likely to show signs of jealousy and paranoia, dispite some saying 'opposites attract'. There have been numerous attempts to prove or disprove this theory and it does seem to be true that couple do tend to be matched in terms of physical attractiveness when rated by strangers.
Byrne and Clore, in 1970, proposed the 'Reward/Need Satisfaction' theory which implies that we develop relatinships based on the satisfaction we get from that relationship. Byrne and Clore said that when our partner 'rewards' us we view them more positively (operant conditioning). Rewards may come in the form of gifts and presents but also factors such as company. Classical conditioning also play a part in this theory because if we meet someone in a pleasant situation e.g. a party, we tend to think more highly of that person. The development of the relationship relies on positive reinforcement (e.g. recieving gifts), negative reinforcement (e.g. removal of loneliness) and need satisfaction (e.g. sex).
In the 60s, psychologist Holman had his own theory as to why relationships formed and why some last longer than others. Holman added on to what Byrne and Clore suggested. Holman argued that maintaining a relationship is based on how much you put it and get out of the relationship. His theory is known as 'Social exchange theory' and consists of an economic theme. According to Holman, the most satisfying, long-lasting relationships are those with high rewards and low costs. Holman's theory was strengethened by the addition of