OD
FEATURE BY TANISHA RUSSELL DAY
Photographed, Tanisha Russell Day
and her darling son, Nehemiah
Up until a few months ago, I still felt the
same; guarded. Some fear of commitment
and being way too overprotective of my
son. A few months ago, Nehemiah said,
“Mommy, don’t you want a boyfriend or
husband? I need somebody around here
to do boy stuff with me and you need
help!” You could imagine the expression
on my face! Yep! That face! And also feeling
like a charity case! LOL! I responded and
said, “Nehemiah, it’s not just about me
having a boyfriend or husband, but for
that someone to be good for both me
AND you. The right one is coming, in
God’s perfect divine time. My heart is
now open to receive.” He hugged me and
said, “Thanks Mommy, I didn’t know that.”
I’m sure he was also thinking, “THANK
GOODNESS!” LOL!
Having a village was also essential to having
a healthy life for both me and Nehemiah.
He needed his friends and family to hang
out with (especially boys, I don’t know
boy stuff , lol) and I needed the same as a
mom, a woman and as Tanisha. Most of
the social events I attended over the years
were family friendly because where you
saw me, you most likely saw Nehemiah.
My village (relatives, church family and
friends) stepped in at times when I needed
support, “Me Time” or advice. If we don’t
speak up and share when we need help,
some people will never know. We have to
know when to remove the mask and when
to be transparent (of course in a safe
space with the right people) and say, “I’m
not doing too good today, I need a little
help.” Everyone needs help sometime.
We can only do but so much on our
own. We as single moms juggle a lot but
there are resources there for us, tap into
your network. And when our plates are
overfl owing, it’s okay to say, “no” with love,
if there’s something we aren’t able to do.
We can still love our children and be
superheroes for them, without losing
ourselves. While we’re making time for our
babies (no matter what age they are, they
will forever be our babies), let’s always
remember to make time for ourselves.
For all of the sacrifi ces you’ve made, for
the struggles you’ve overcome, for the
dark nights that passed when only God
could give you peace, BELOVED, I SALUTE
YOU!
Tanisha Russell Day is founder and CEO of
Key HR Consulting. She may be reached at
[email protected]