That’s a summary of my life right now.
December 5th
I have my first-semester exam, am I prepared for it?
Maybe. No. I don’t know.
Is it math?
Crap it is.
Does my school care that anxiety is a thing?
Um… probably not.
Will I fail?
Probably.
Will my parents kill me if I do?
Yes.
Don’t over think.
Don’t over think.
Don’t over think.
I took a seat at my desk and started to breathe heavily. It eventually calmed me down
because I don’t have time to have an anxiety attack in front of everyone. The day went
by pretty quickly and I was soon at ballet class. The whole class went by smoothly and I
had great technique today which was pretty great for the first time in a while. Tomorrow I
have my first appointment at the mental health center in the hospital that my mom
scheduled for me. I hope I get run over by a truck before then because I know it won’t
help. Okay, I’m totally kidding don’t get mad oops. I really want to get rid of my stupid
anxiety disorder since it’s really severe. So, I guess I’ll see what happens.
December 6th
Okay, so my mom didn’t tell me she was gonna pull me out of school for this mental
therapy thing… I knew it was coming but I didn’t think it would actually be that my mom
would pull me out of school. I walked in the building and it already smells like medicine
and hand sanitizer. Sickening? Oh yes.
The therapist doctor lady won’t like me
I’m gonna embarrass myself somehow
I’m gonna look like a retard
Am I a retard?
Maybe.
Oh my god I’m kind of retarded
Nobody likes me
I don’t have friends…