Becoming a parent frequently reshapes how men see themselves.
parenting
Cognitive and social development support
Children who grow up in homes with engaged fathers not only develop stronger self-worth, they also perform better academically.
“ Dads often engage children in play that is exploratory, problem-focused, physically active, or imaginative,” says Moos. These types of play spark curiosity and creativity, encourage flexible thinking, strengthen problem-solving skills, and support language development – especially when fathers explain, question, or introduce new ideas.
Children’ s values, attitudes, and behaviours
Children with involved fathers are also less likely to develop behavioural problems.“ Fathers shape children’ s values, attitudes, and behaviours less through formal teaching and more through everyday interactions that children observe and experience repeatedly,” explains Moos.
When fathers( or father figures) show up authentically, children absorb what they see – not only what they hear.“ Actions truly speak louder than words, and consistent modelling of respect, empathy, and integrity leaves a lasting imprint on a child’ s character,” she notes.
Becoming a parent frequently reshapes how men see themselves.
The changing identity of‘ dads’
Times are changing, and the role of fathers looks very different today than it did for our parents. For fathers, it was once considered enough to simply be the“ provider”. But with mothers contributing
www. babysandbeyond. co. za equally in the workforce, fathers often find themselves questioning their evolving role – not just as providers but as caregivers too.
“ However, the fast-paced and demanding work world places real pressure on dads trying to maintain a healthy work-life balance. To be emotionally present, fathers need emotional literacy and selfawareness. This often requires healing from their own childhood experiences and developing the crucial skills needed to truly connect with their children,” says Moos.
Becoming a parent frequently reshapes how men see themselves. Balancing the roles of provider, caregiver and partner while arriving at a healthy sense of self is a journey that takes time, reflection and growth.
Modern dad’ s guide: start simple
As you adapt to this evolving role it can feel overwhelming – you may worry you’ re doing everything wrong, especially when it seems to come more naturally to mom. But Moos offers simple advice.“ The most important need of younger children is play. So play with them – not because you have to, but because you choose to.”
You don’ t need to be perfect; parenting is a learning process for mom, dad, and child alike. Presence, consistency, and a willingness to grow matter far more than perfection. Regular one-on-one time is surprisingly powerful. Not only does it give mom a much-needed break, it also makes your child feel truly seen and heard.“ Put it in your calendar, if need be,” she suggests.“ Keep those dates, and make sure they’ re one-on-one, doing something the child chooses.”
If you still feel overwhelmed, consider joining a parenting workshop, a dads’ support group, or even individual parent coaching if you prefer privacy.“ You are not alone,” she reassures.
Showing up for dad
If dad is making the effort, mom can show appreciation for his presence and commitment. Moos suggests starting by identifying his love language. There are simple online tests you can take together, because appreciation goes both ways.
Based on his love language, here are Moos’ s ideas for celebrating dad on Father’ s Day and beyond: Words of Affirmation: Create a family gratitude file where everyone writes notes, records videos, or shares favourite memories about dad. Younger children can draw pictures or write short messages of appreciation. Quality Time: Plan a day around dad’ s interests – like a nature walk, beach outing, cooking together, watching a favourite movie, or enjoying a sports game. Acts of Service: Take something off his plate, like a chore or family obligation he doesn’ t enjoy, to show care through action. Physical Touch: Give him long, genuine hugs until he beams, or create a“ Hug Coupon Book” he can redeem throughout the year. Gifts: Choose something that resonates deeply with who he is as a man, father, and partner. Examples: season tickets if he loves sports, or a new tool if he enjoys working with his hands.
“ Fatherhood is not defined by one day of recognition but by the many moments of guidance, care, and connection that happen throughout the year,” says Moos.“ When families acknowledge these moments regularly, they strengthen the foundation children grow up with, allowing them to thrive and carry a healthy model into their adult lives.” �
55