6
Aptavani-9
deep within your self to see it. You have to adopt an impartial
attitude to see obstinacy.
When someone says, ‘Why are you being obstinate?’ you
respond by saying, ‘Just look at him! He is a fool. Am I being
obstinate or he is being obstinate?’, on the contrary the man is
telling you to investigate, so then you should. People do not look
at their own obstinacy and they go looking for obstinacy in
others. Why do people not accuse me of being obstinate? If
they were to see obstinacy in me, they would not refrain from
telling me so. The world will tell you what it sees.
When obstinacy leaves…
Some men tell their wives, ‘If you make the tea, I will not
drink it.’ Oh! ho ho! Then whose tea will you drink? Exercising
his role as a husband (dhani; owner), he intimidates his wife.
What does he tell her? ‘You ruined the tea, so I will not drink
tea again if you make it.’ He intimidates the poor woman. He
becomes awkward and obstinate. So much obstinacy! That is
why there is so much suffering!
Therefore, obstinacy (aadayee) is the obstacle, not
attachment (moha). A person may enjoy attachment (moha)
once or twice but the third time around he will get tired of it.
What happens if someone serves you a good meal with an
upset and a non-communicative (risavu; sulking) face? You will
not like it, will you? Would you not say, ‘The heck with your
meal’? Even if someone gives you diamonds with an upset and
non-communicative (risavu) face, will you not say, ‘Keep your
diamonds to yourself’? So what is worth more, diamonds or an
upset and non-communicative (risavu) face? Our people will
not accept a diamond if given by someone with such a face.
People of foreign countries will eat a meal even if their spouse
is upset and non-communicative (risavu) but in India, the wife
will get into trouble for doing that. Nevertheless, women in India
will not behave this way. It does not matter in the foreign