Aptavani-9
95
you correct it thus: just behave as if that you never saw anything
in the first place? It is all already there ‘underground’, but the
father worries, ‘What if this were to happen?’ He becomes
possessed with ghosts of suspicion, which will not leave him
alone, the whole nightlong. These ghosts will not let him go for
months on end. Therefore, it is wrong to have suspicions.
Suspicion? No, take care of her
A father of four girls had come to me for advice. He said,
‘I have four daughters going to college and it is natural to be
concerned. What should I do about it? What should I do about
these four girls? What if they get on the wrong path?’ I told him,
‘But they will not improve by you being suspicious.’ Do not be
suspicious. When they come home, sit down with them and talk
to them properly, be friends with them. Talk to them about their
likes and dislikes. Do not be preoccupied with your job and
making money. Take care of your daughters needs first. They
love it when you eat, drink and talk with them. The love you
have for them is superficial and that is why they seek love
elsewhere.
Then I asked him if he would throw his daughter out of
the house if she fell in love with someone and stayed out late at
night? He tells me, ‘Yes, I will tell her to get out. I would not
let her come into the house.’ I told him, ‘Do not ever do that.
Where would she go in the middle of the night? Where would
she take shelter? You should tell her, ‘Come. Sit. Go to sleep’
There is a rule that you have already suffered damage but now
just make sure that you do not suffer double the damage. The
girl had already done harm by her actions but it would be a
disaster if you were to throw her out of the house. When you
have incurred a loss of a hundred thousand dollars, would you
do something to reduce the loss or increase it? Should there not
be a solution for the loss you are incurring? So do not incur any
more loss. Let her go to sleep and the next day explain to her
that she should come home on time and that it makes you very