Aptavani-2
535
‘We’ have not even spent a single second outside of this state.
We have no awareness that ‘this body is mine’. There is a
continuous awareness of it being there, as a neighbor, the first
neighbor.
The slightest play; dwelling as the pudgal (pudgal
ramanata), in the non-self, will prevent the attainment of the
Self. One may get a hint of the Self, but he will not become the
Self. He will not become the Self that the Lord has described.
Such a Self is absolutely still (achad atma). All other states of
Soul are unsteady and ‘mobile’. As long as there is dwelling in
the non-self, the self will be unsteady and mobile (chanchad
atma). The Lord has said that there are two kinds of dwellings:
one is that of the pure Self (shuddha chetan, Shuddhatma). This
is the dwelling of the supreme Self (parmatma). If this dwelling
is not there, then there is the dwelling in the non-self, which is
also considered dwelling in the toys. It is considered as playing
with toys.
Everything is a play of toys
Yes, even children play with toys, do they not? If you give
a five-year-old a toy a two-year-old would play, will he play
with it? No, he will not. He will tell you, “These are not my toys;
these are for little children.” Therefore, an older child will not
play with toys younger children play with and vice versa. An
eleven-year-old child will not play with the toys of a five-year-
old. He will say, “I want to play cricket.” Then he will play
‘toys’ such as cricket, football, volleyball etc. Then by age
eighteen he develops an interest for books. Then books will
become his ‘toys’. What do we call this liking and interest
towards the books? Wherever there is liking (ruchi) towards
something it is called ramanata (engrossment through enjoyment).
Therefore, books, football, dolls are all considered toys. Then
when he turns twenty-two, he will tell you, “Now, I don’t want
to play with these dolls. I will