Domestic Abuse, “It’s
Life.”
Why is it this way? Why do
these men abuse their wives
and children?
A study is shown that men are
more likely to abuse the
By Mahri Carmichael
women in their lives if they
1 in 4 women will be a victim of domestic abuse in have seen it as a child. A
their lifetime; many of them will face repetitions.
child’s brain is
impressionable, everything
Domestic abuse is where an individual tries to gain
they see or do as a child they
power over the other in a relationship. It comes in 4
may not remember
broad categories, physical, sexual and psychological/
emotional, and financial. Physical abuse can be anything consciously, but subconsciously they will, and it will have an effect on their
from being pushed or slapped or spat on, to being
lives and how they treat others and themselves. We
violently beaten with or without a weapon. Sexual
abuse includes any form of sexual act being forced upon need to teach our children from the outset what’s right
and wrong.
at any time without consent. It is difficult for women
who are abused by their partner to negotiate any form
On average, 2 women a week are killed by their
of sexual relationship that is free and equal.
current/former partner.
Psychological/emotional abuse is a broad form of abuse
These women that are suffering need help. They need
that ranges from constantly being put down and
people to notice and do something about it. They need
referred to in derogatory manners to being watched and
to stay strong and speak up because they will be
followed, threatened, having personal items checked
protected.
like text messages/emails. Financial abuse is when the
The interviewee I mentioned earlier has been in
money is controlled, the woman may have her bank
cards and money removed from her, she may be refused counselling for quite a while now, when the incidents
occurred she was younger and at the time felt that help
to buy items for the children or herself and all money
was forced upon her, so she didn’t react well. However
used must be accounted for with receipts and bank
now, she finds herself battling with depression, and she
statements.
sought out the help herself for her past traumas. She’s
One incident of domestic violence is reported to
feeling better now, more able to cope with daily life.
the police every minute.
During an interview with a young female victim of
domestic abuse, she told me of her past. She’d been
raped more than once and she’d been emotionally
abused by an ex-boyfriend who still kept in touch. She
told me about her father beating her mother during her
childhood and how she battled with everything she’d
seen later in life making it necessary for her to start
counselling. What struck me during her interview was
that after telling me her story, she said “It’s Life.”
At 18 years old a young girl has accepted being
emotionally abused and raped as a part of life. That it is
a normal thing to encounter in a lifetime. It’s a horrible
thing to encounter any form of abuse, but to have to
accept it as a part of your life every single day must be
unbearable.
If you or someone you know has been affected by
domestic abuse, please contact Women's Aid National
Freephone Helpline: 1800 341 900
Open 10am to 10pm, 7 days a week, Except Christmas
Day.
You are not alone.