The weight loss‘ book club’ 201 therapy group. Some issues are too big for this group format and are better dealt with by a professional therapist. All forms of childhood abuse would fall under this category. While such issues may come up from time to time it is important that the group responds sensitively to such issues and validates them – without going deeper into them. Such issues are best validated by encouraging the person to get help. The best way to do this is around the argument that they are worthy of receiving professional help for such issues. There are many well qualified psychiatrists, psychologists and counselors available to help people work through these kinds of emotionally disabling issues. If group members are brave enough to have seen a therapist then their experience of their therapy and their therapist would make a valuable subject for discussion – if they feel comfortable doing so. Finally, this is a‘ book club’ and book clubs are meant to be social, relaxed and fun first, and about weight loss( or reading books) second. Rigid rules and formats are out, flexibility and spontaneity are in. An individual’ s setbacks( over-eating, weight gain, etc.) are normal and no criticism of the person is allowed. Understanding and learning from setbacks, as we have discussed, is the key. Members should be encouraged to discuss setbacks with a view to exploring exactly how they occurred and what can be learned from them. It is always informative to explore the events leading up to a setback, and the person’ s state of mind at the time in some detail. Experience is the most powerful teacher but it is also the slowest way to learn. When we can put our ego aside and admit that we make mistakes too, we can learn much from other people’ s experience. Finally, the goal is understanding not judgment. In fact if you take the time to understand why someone behaves the way they do you will find that it is almost impossible to judge them. It is through understanding that we make the process a learning experience not a failure experience. Learning experiences allow us to persist. Persistence breeds ultimate success. Remember, the only failure that exists is the failure brought into existence the moment we stop trying.