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Do you do any of these annoying behaviors that make people avoid you like the plague ? by MARK WEBB
Mark Webb is a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice at Oakwood Counseling Center in Valdosta . He is the author of “ How To Be A Great Partner ” and “ How To Argueproof Your Relationship .” Read more of his articles at www . TheRelationshipSpecialist . com .
1You always have to be right . Some people just have to win . They are overly competitive . Even if they are wrong , they usually overpower the other person with intimidation or an overwhelming verbal attack that forces the other person to concede defeat . These people are often emotional bullies who never have deep and meaningful relationships with others . People feel like they are walking on eggshells around them because they know how dominating they can be and few topics are worth the exhaustion of dealing with them . If this behavior sounds like you and you want to correct this behavior , acknowledge others victories and show good sportsmanship . It not only makes you more likable but also helps in curbing that excessive competitive urge . We have a saying in taekwondo , “ Be humble in victory . Be humble in defeat .”
2You refuse to show empathy and compassion . Showing empathy and compassion is not about solving other people ’ s problems . It is about showing that you understand or at the very least , that you are trying to understand what the other person is going through . If you have difficulty showing empathy for others , this translates to mean that you have trouble stepping into someone else ’ s shoes . Having the ability to feel someone ’ s struggles is a quality that is important for a meaningful relationship to occur . If this fails to exist , you are only showing the other person you lack insight into their side of things or worse that you don ’ t even care . If you want to correct this behavior , get into the habit of asking others how they are doing and then actually listen to their response .
3You overstep the boundaries of others . Whether it is someone ’ s personal space , their time or their emotional boundaries , failing to respect these limits says a lot about your consideration for others . If you are the type to pry too deep into the personal matters of others or you insist on where you go as a couple or group despite their feelings of reluctance , you are essentially saying that your needs are more important than theirs . If you want to correct this behavior , strive to develop a more respectful habit by asking for permission rather than assuming that it is okay to cross the boundary of someone else .
4You dominate the conversation . Do you do the majority of the talking when there is supposed to be a more interactive dialogue between you and the other person or people ? When you hog
44 Valdosta Scene | December 2023