3. You can’t truly forgive unless you have grasped the extent of the hurt and resentment you are feeling. With the help of a counselor, minister, or another professional, you need to seek to understand how the divorce has affected your self-esteem, your security, your trust and your faith.
4. Now it’s time to make the big decision to surrender. Let go of your deep desire to get even with the spouse or parent who has hurt you. Come up with a prayer or statement announcing your decision. For example: By an act of my will, and God’s power, I give up my rights to get even with (insert name). I make a commitment that when those feelings come over me again, I will release them.
5. Make a choice to have compassion on the person who hurt you. One way to show compassion is to pray for the person who has hurt you. Jesus said, “Pray for your enemies.” He knows it is impossible to continue to pray for someone, and still hate them.
6. Move on. It’s time to stop dwelling on the past or what “could have been”. Let go and move forward with your life.