6 Stages of Divorce Recovery:
Denial – Pretending the divorce never happened or downplaying its significance in your life. Denial is a way to shut down until you are ready to deal with the pain. Counseling is important during this stage.
Anger - Once you are past the initial pain, you still may be left with deep anger. It may be well justified, but that doesn’t mean it’s healthy. You need to control your anger and find a healthy outlet for it. Exercise can be a great outlet...find something you like to do; such as, running, going to the gym, swimming, walking, kickboxing, Crossfit, etc. Also, finding a hobby you love can be a great outlet.
Bargaining – Desperately trying anything to gain back the spouse (jealousy, a makeover, promises to never do something again, a vacation together, etc.). Unfortunately it’s probably too late for quick fixes at this point and you are just setting yourself up for more hurt. Support groups can be very helpful at this stage.
Depression – It is normal to grieve the loss of your marriage and during this stage your emotional tank is empty leaving you feeling very down, exhausted, irritable. Confide in a good friend at this point who encourages you by supporting you, not by telling you to “snap out of it.”
Acceptance - The time has come when you realize the past is past and it’s time to live in the present and think about the future in a new light. You will reach this stage in your own time and all of a sudden be ready to move on.
Forgiveness – Releasing bitterness toward the ex-spouse and developing a new relationship with civility and effective boundaries. As long as you are holding onto every bad thing that happened to you in your marriage, you are keeping yourself imprisoned by it. Forgiveness frees you to move on. And remember to forgive yourself in the process for any mistakes you feel you have made.