Rules . He certainly applied them very thoroughly to me . I think I even heard a sniggering laugh as he ticked the relevant box on his clipboard . I pulled my helmet on and prepared to ride off — but then fate intervened , angels trumpeted , and a young woman walked out across the carpark , and asked Il Duce piccolo what was going on .
Presumably , he told her I was a worthless and shifty overseas type who had by some fluke managed to get hold of one of the company ’ s marvellous and prestigious machines — but had been rightly told to piss off . She looked at my dirt encrusted and travel weary Tuono with its UK plates and drooping luggage straps , and asked me where I was from . I said I was from Singapore , but that I ’ d ridden all the way from Nordkapp to see the factory and was very sad not to be able to have even a tiny look inside .
“ Wait a minute ,” she said and pulled out her phone while turning her back on the guard .
A few seconds later she turned to me with a smile .
“ Come back tomorrow morning at 10 ,” she said . “ I work in the public relations office , and I think we can arrange for you to have a look around .” Thank you God . “ Where are you staying ?” she asked as an afterthought .
I said I didn ’ t know yet but that I ’ d probably find a local campsite . She gestured me not to ride off just yet , made another call , then told me she ’ d booked me into a room at the hotel that Aprilia ’ s business visitors stayed in , just minutes down the road . And that she ’ d arranged for me to get the company rate of € 70 . And that they didn ’ t actually have a room , only an entire suite with kitchen , lounge room , balcony , bedroom , and all !
The guard looked on grumpily at this disappointingly positive turn of events . I rode off grinning .
That night I ate the most exquisite thin crust pizza , drank Peroni sprawled across a plump sofa , and watched the sun set over my balcony as I anticipated the following day ’ s factory tour . Life was good .
Next morning , at ten on the dot , I was greeted at the gate by a cool engineering-looking guy who turned out not to be a guide , but the Aprilia Deputy Chief of Racing no less . And I was the only person , apart from him , in the whole factory — they had laid on a tour just for me . I shuddered with pleasure .
But then it turned out he couldn ’ t give me a factory tour after all as there was nobody at work ( July , Italy ) to do any assembly — so there was nothing to see . Instead , I would just have to make do with a substitute tour of the Aprilia R & D and Moto GP
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