When we experience a loss, we do recover our lives and go on living, even in the face of having to live a different and changed life than before the loss experience. How one recovers is unique and specific to that individual as there is no right or wrong way to grieve. Feelings are yours to experience in the manner that is specific to you and there is no road map that says how you should feel.
Every journey of grief and loss is a specialized path only you can walk. Even though I may experience the same type of loss, [i.e. the death of a parent or being laid off a job], I still do not know what you are going through as my personality and world view are different. I can relate to having a similar loss experience but the manner in which I handle it will be different. Every loss impacts our sense of self because we have loss something we valued in some manner.
What people can do to support a person who has experienced both death and/or non-death loss is be a witness to your pain, and listen with my whole being to your story of loss, validating you and what you are feeling. Even a loss that leaves one feeling relief and knowing that they have gotten away from a bad situation still activates the broken heart and emotional response of having lost the hopes and dreams they had for the relationship or situation. So, if you have left a relationship that was unhealthy and know it was in your best interest to disengage from it, there was a time when you had hopes and dreams for what it would hold.
Each of us has some unfinished personal emotional business related to any loss; be it regrets, or feelings of guilt “I wish I had told him I loved him one more time. I should have left this relationship sooner…I wish I had taken my pet to the vet…” Loss occurs even when a happy event such as a marriage, pregnancy, new job or career, a new kitten or puppy, [i.e. empty nest, loss of independence, hormonal changes and change in lifestyle, a reminder of past pets or family who have died]. Being able to let go of the emotional baggage as it occurs gives one the ability to more fully embrace the whole relationship without guilt, or remorse but instead with honor, respect and caring.