If these interactions constitute a state of unwitting
cohabitance with other Philadelphians, the same
can be said for my interactions online. Every day I
read, see, watch, and otherwise live vicariously
through my friends’ documentation of their lives. I
encounter comment sections, product reviews, and
clickbaity think pieces from dubious blogs--not to
mention the unending deluge of memes. At times, it
can feel as though my downtime is an extended
exercise in reading inane Facebook comments. In
this sense, the internet feels not unlike a city: it’s a
forum for friends and strangers, a space in which a
mass of people similarly coexist in an uneasy
entente. As such, it lends itself to facilitating
encounters similar to the ones described above.
Wading through the internet can often produce as
many of these meaningless interactions as walking
down the street. This confluence of different people
and ideas, though, can also produce disarming
encounters--poignant moments with strangers,
heightened by their unexpected nature. Personally,
I’ve encountered this in pleasantries evolving into
intimate conversations with the stranger on the next
barstool over, or being jolted out of mindless
scrolling by a friend’s coming out announcement. In
this case, it came in the form of an old woman’s
Amazon reviews.
I first encountered Betty the Librarian while reading
headphone reviews in bed (why I read headphone
reviews in bed at midnight is a matter for another
article).
Something about her review of Aftershokz AS400
Sportz 3 Open Ear Headphones immediately lured
me in; the tone, the incredible attention to detail,
and the sheer length of her review lent it a jarringly
earnest feel that contrasted with the repetitive,
mundane form these reviews usually take. For
example, here’s her most recent review, evaluating
WPM'S 17 By 24-inch Incredibly Soft and Absorbent
Memory Foam Bath Mat, in Sage:
This item was advertised as a skid free bath mat but
that's not the reason I ordered it. I am using it as a mat
to prevent the 52-pound desktop that I have placed
on top of a Bush adjustable height Mobile Table that is
placed over the front end of my Rebel Treadmill. The
Rebel is designed to permit individuals to walk
between 1/2 and 2 mph so they can work at a standing
desk while walking on the treadmill. Most people
using the Rebel walk at a speed of 1.8 mph and do all
kinds of work all or most of their work day and are
very happy with the results such activity has on both
their mind and body. I use the Rebel too but not at
work. I will be 82 years old this week and my regular
speed is 8/10 mph and on a very good day I can go up
to 9/10 mph. Since I have to hold onto the desk to
keep my balance while walking, I have been
practicing trying to walk taking larger strides while
holding on with only one hand in order for Fitbit to
track my steps -- and holding on with only one hand
caused my desktop to slide toward me. I put the skid
free mat between the table and the desktop and now
everything works fine. The price was most reasonable
and the product is super nice. If you wanted to use it
as a bath mat, it is washable, soft, comfortable and
well made -- no matter the price.”
To date, Betty has reviewed 106 products on Amazon,
with lengths ranging from a short paragraph to well
over 1,000 words. To describe her contributions as
being merely “reviews,” though, would be to do them a
grave disservice; part personal essay, part exhaustive
recounting of everything else she’s bought on Amazon
and how they work harmoniously together to improve
her life, and part incredibly thorough appraisal of the
object at hand, Betty’s reviews are an exercise in
autobiography wrapped in product dimensions and
praise for her newest acquisition. To read them is to
take an intimate look at her life--newly 82, living on the
7th floor of her retirement community in San Antonio,
trying to carve out a productive life by remaining active
(to date, she’s reviewed six ellipticals and treadmills
alone), keeping up on the news (with her seven
tablets), and spending quality time with her two
chihuahuas (on her Patio Heavens Bird Nest Hanging
Chair with Arms).