The Scientific Journal of International Science Volume VI Issue I | Page 19

What are you currently working on, and how is it at the cutting edge of scientific discovery?

Presently, I'm looking into extra-terrestrial communication or in a more scientific sense "Assigning Rationality accents from the Speech of Extra-terrestrials" or ARSE! I currently use fossilized remains of aliens from hillbillies and attempt to classify any sounds emanating from these creatures when compressed air is forced into their skulls. This is the first time such experiments have been undertaken and why gosh, they speak just like the alien creature who phoned me!

What are you hoping to work on in the future?

I hope to look into cyptozoology and see if dinosaurs are still living among us (and who knows, one maybe right next to you in the office doing stock broking or at the tills in Tesco).

Apart from science, what do you like to get up to in your spare time?

Touching and licking rocks, doing science, caning lazy PhD students and cashing in on my gold finds at Cash Converters!

Over the least year or so, SJIS has published a number of extraordinary discoveries, from the meaning of life, the correct religion, and a complete list of all the species on the planet, amongst others. Some are saying that there is very little science left to discover, what are your thoughts?

We are so close to obtaining the answers to everything. I'd say we are 99% there, but although we have answered roughly around 10 billion questions, we still have millions left to answer.

Thank you very much. I'll finish off with a joke. Knock knock.

Who's there?

A Geologist.

A Geologist who?

I like rocks.

[Laughter]

I made a bet to see if I could sell this rock. Will you buy it?

Image courtesy of imagerymajestic / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of chrisroll / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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