Wainman, C.‘
Hello Dr Wainman, and thanks for your time. I'd like to kick off by asking, what is your full title, and in which field do you specialise?
My full title is "Professor Emeritus of the University of Middle Earth, Birmingham, UK (OBE, MBE, MEP, BBC)" and specialise in the field of Astrobiology, which is part of the Department of Pseudo Science (it achieved 5 star rating in The Times University Guide 2013 in student satisfaction) and currently looking into extra terrestrial communication (one called me on my iPhone last week!)
Pseudo Science? Doesn't that lower your credibility somewhat’? Our readers might start thinking you're akin to the psychologists.
Maybe I'm taking it too far! How about Planetary Geology?
Fair enough! You featured in a previous SJIS issue as a leading expert in ancient pollen. Now you're a leading expert in astrobiology, how do you cope having your fingers in so many pies?
As they say, there are more suns than grains of sand so there must be more aliens than grains of pollen! Plus, the ancient pollen was giving me hay fever so I couldn't carry on finding all the worlds lost pollen grains.
In another previous issue, SJIS announced alien contact by man. I assume you were involved, what did you do?
Indeed and didn't get a mention in that issue. One day, I phoned Argos for a quote on large hadron collider and instead an alien picked up and said he wanted me for experiments. Ever since, the creature has been hassling me daily for my services and my colleague has been producing the transcripts for SJIS on these riveting conversations.
We apologise for not crediting you, but we're excited to publish those transcripts and you're sure to be noticed then! We're told your original degree was in geology. As such, what is your best sandcastle creating advice?
A good question! It's all about location: just head to Southend-on-Sea or Clacton where human activities make the sand more cohesive than usual, creating a firm sandcastle when it leaves any moulding medium. Bon!
Scientist in the Spotlight
This Issue's Scientist in the Spotlight is Dr Carmine Wainman, geologist, astrobiologist, raconteur and international chutney enthusiast. Read the inspiring interview below to discover more about the man and the mysteries he has concealed from the world.