Correspondence
14
Dr joe spencer
Scientist in the Spotlight
Physicist under-compensating by working on carbion nanotubes
I am a highly experienced psychologist, and I have thoroughly enjoyed reading the issues so far in Volume VI. I have a couple of articles from my own research, would you be willing to consider them for publication in the next issue?
Dr. K. Norman.
Dear SJIS
No.
Dear SJIS
I wrote to you some weeks ago about my psychic abilities and was shocked by your flippant response (featured in Volume VI Issue 1) and total disregard for the number of hats I wear at once. My moustache bristled with so much indignation it flew off and I haven't seen it for 8 weeks. This has caused me great pain, as much of my gravitas (and indeed psychic power) is derived from my finely waxed facial hair. When will you cease this onslaught of negative publicity?
Giles
NEVER!
Hello Dr Spencer, thanks for your time. To start, what is your full title and what is your specialist field?
Dr Spencer PhD. My specialist field is physics and less generally I do general relativity, but more generally I study nanostructures, specifically carbon nanotubes.
2 years ago, in SJIS III(3), you published a groundbreaking article entitled ‘Forces and pivots and shit’. Care to elaborate?
I do remember that, it was one of the first articles I published. In fact, it’s what led me to pursue a career in science. ‘Forces and Pivots and shit,’ was, excuse the pun, a turning point in my career.
It’s fair to say you’ve had a bumpy ride as a SJIS employee. How are they treating you now? Have they started paying you yet?
It’s true, I did get to a shaky start; sometimes we didn’t see eye to eye, but now I’m starting to understand the SJIS process more. I haven’t been paid yet, well not in money, but I do receive discounts on all SJIS merchandise, like Dr Carmine T-shirts.
Is the Higgs Boson real?
Let me answer your question with another question: are you real? And also, which part of a Neapolitan ice cream do you like the least? I think that is more than enough information to answer your question now.