THE REAL MAGAZINE SPRING ISSUE | Page 14

FEATURE # CLEANING OUT YOUR CLOSET: FRIEND OR FOE? By: Mmagauta Kgang Spring used to be a daunting time for me as a black girl: the dreaded 'spring cleaning'session would be coming in at least the first two weeks of September. Curtains and windows needed washing, blankets needed washing, cupboards needed to be emptied and washed out, closets were emptied of old clothes to make space fro new clothes.. I still have terrible flash backs of that time.lol. As life kept teaching me lessons each season, I came to appreciate the notion of "spring cleaning", with time, I started seeing the merits of it. I'm still not a fan of the ACTUAL cleaning part, but its a concept you need to consider applying to your friendships too. Here's why: Birds of a feather Flock together. First, you have to assess your current friendships: There are two approaches you can take to assessing friendships and what to do with them. The first is to ask yourself, Does my circle of friends meet my social and emotional needs? Start by wondering, On the whole, do I have enough intimates whom I’d die for and who’d die for me (okay, that’s a bit over the top, but you get the gist)? I’m talking about sacred sisters (or brothers) who have proved themselves over and over and are just about the most spectacular friends anyone on the planet could ever wish for. You want to have at least one, if not two or three of these. I know that’s a tall order, but it helps to have more, rather than fewer, close friends. In spite of cell phone accessibility, friends occasionally deserve private time and do drift out of signal range. 15