READY FOR SEX?
first... know thyself
By Zanele Ntuli
# S H E _ S A Y S
# HESAYS
Sex. I’ m not about to tell you anything new about sex, but I’ m about to make you think about it..... selfishly. As ladies, we are faced with choices at every turn of life, and from the choices we make; we learn lessons that bring us closer to selfknowledge in all areas of life. When it comes to sex though, things are a bit flipped: selfknowledge is key to having a healthy sex life.
On a daily basis, we are bombarded with messages about sex: Sex sells the music we listen to; we see its influence on our social media feeds and the fashion we wear is sexified to the max, yes you know I’ m right: ya’ ll are out there wearing bum-out shorts because the TV told you it was sexy and cool. As you grow into young adulthood it is normal to think about sex, have feelings about it, be curious about it... and how can you not? It’ s only natural. As a young ladies, we are confronted with the choice of“ todo or not-to-do” at a very young age and we are somehow miraculously expected to make these decisions mostly with information garnered from our friends or television shows( face palm, head shake).
Hindsight has taught me that, as a girl child, you have to understand what makes you tick; what is important to you; and develop a healthy love for yourself. If any of these are not aligned, you are unlikely to make decisions that serve your best interests. It is our responsibility to learn about our bodies and be honest with ourselves as to our readiness for sexual relationships.
You have to be empowered by the knowledge of self in order to make informed decisions. Fear not, I am here to help you sort out the confusion that comes with the“ to-do or not-to-do” dilemma: I will discuss with you the options you have at play that will allow you to make an informed choice... before I do, lets start with discussing the society we live in.
IN OUR SOCIETY
According to Statistics SA, more and more teens in South Africans are having sex at a younger age, adding to the dilemma, the HIV / AIDS infection rate of girls between the age groups of 15 – 24 is on an increase: it is actually eight times higher than that of boys in the same age group * gasp *.
The Department of Health has also noted that this age group of girls is targeted by older men that prey on the innocence of youth, the so-called Sugar Daddies. In response to this problem, the department will be spending R 3 billion in the next three years on a Sugar Daddies Campaign that aims to urge young women to stay away from Sugar daddies, who at times force them into a sexual relationships that result in young girls falling pregnant or catching an STI.
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