THE REAL MAGAZINE ISSUE 4 | Page 21

READY FOR SEX ?

first ... know thyself

By Zanele Ntuli
# S H E _ S A Y S
# HESAYS
Sex . I ’ m not about to tell you anything new about sex , but I ’ m about to make you think about it ..... selfishly . As ladies , we are faced with choices at every turn of life , and from the choices we make ; we learn lessons that bring us closer to selfknowledge in all areas of life . When it comes to sex though , things are a bit flipped : selfknowledge is key to having a healthy sex life .
On a daily basis , we are bombarded with messages about sex : Sex sells the music we listen to ; we see its influence on our social media feeds and the fashion we wear is sexified to the max , yes you know I ’ m right : ya ’ ll are out there wearing bum-out shorts because the TV told you it was sexy and cool . As you grow into young adulthood it is normal to think about sex , have feelings about it , be curious about it ... and how can you not ? It ’ s only natural . As a young ladies , we are confronted with the choice of “ todo or not-to-do ” at a very young age and we are somehow miraculously expected to make these decisions mostly with information garnered from our friends or television shows ( face palm , head shake ).
Hindsight has taught me that , as a girl child , you have to understand what makes you tick ; what is important to you ; and develop a healthy love for yourself . If any of these are not aligned , you are unlikely to make decisions that serve your best interests . It is our responsibility to learn about our bodies and be honest with ourselves as to our readiness for sexual relationships .
You have to be empowered by the knowledge of self in order to make informed decisions . Fear not , I am here to help you sort out the confusion that comes with the “ to-do or not-to-do ” dilemma : I will discuss with you the options you have at play that will allow you to make an informed choice ... before I do , lets start with discussing the society we live in .
IN OUR SOCIETY
According to Statistics SA , more and more teens in South Africans are having sex at a younger age , adding to the dilemma , the HIV / AIDS infection rate of girls between the age groups of 15 – 24 is on an increase : it is actually eight times higher than that of boys in the same age group * gasp *.
The Department of Health has also noted that this age group of girls is targeted by older men that prey on the innocence of youth , the so-called Sugar Daddies . In response to this problem , the department will be spending R 3 billion in the next three years on a Sugar Daddies Campaign that aims to urge young women to stay away from Sugar daddies , who at times force them into a sexual relationships that result in young girls falling pregnant or catching an STI .
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