The Perfect Gentleman Issue 9 - Christmas | Page 25

Why does this question does makes people feel
apprehensive? Is it because they don’t have
‘free’ time, is it because while they are happy to
be appraised, evaluated and assets based on
their professional achievements, they are
reluctant to do the same with their personal
lives, is it because they hate to admit that most
of their ‘free’ time is wasted? For women,
mostly, the answer is pronounced with a
somewhat bitter undertone of “Who the hell has
the time?!” proceeded by a long list of working
hours, commute times, domestic chores,
errands and responsibilities. In the more
aggravated one’s (not for the lack of a better
word) it sometimes followed by “unlike you” or
something along these lines, list all the reasons
why ‘leisure’ is a word reserved for ladies who
‘do lunch’ and why they can’t dedicated their
‘free’ time to themselves. I personally think they
reactions have little to do with me and more
often than not, indicate their sense of shame at
losing their individuality and their self esteem,
by thinking that as a parent , a spouse or a full
time professional you no longer deserve
‘pleasure time’ or are embarrassed of not
having personal interests worthy enough. “Do
you do arts & crafts with your kids?” I ask after
letting them finish spitting venom, ”Off course
I do!" Most proclaim enthusiastically, on regular
bases? Yes! But it is not for me it’s for them,
they quickly add as they foresee where I am
going with that. Do you not get pleasure from
seeing your kids happy with that toilet roll
submarine you’ve just made with them? I could
carry on and explain how the kid doesn’t really
care about the submarine but at the time his or
her mother or father dedicated to making it but
I don’t. I admit that this Socratic way of getting
to know someone has its pros and cons.

As I have started writing this well in advance, I
have decided to extend my research beyond the
comfort of my own home and venture out to
one of my favourite places in London, the
shrine of human creativity – the V&A. Despite
being there dozens of times over the years, I
have never had the ‘pleasure’ to queue outside. I
have embraced the necessary evil on this rainy
weekend and took my time to examine the
building from the outside. ‘The excellence of
every art must consist in the complete
accomplishment of its purpose’, read the
inscription by Sir Joshua Reynolds round the
door arch. I knew I came to the right place...
Looking around I’ve kept my focus on this
article while marvelling on the craftsmanship,
the divine imagination and the time that went it
to the creations around me. Out of 233, 742
individual treasures displayed at the museum,
surly not all of them were made by what we
would call ‘a full time artist’ and even the ones
that were, the amount of detail, the skill the
time and the love that went in to it and off
course the unquantifiable pleasure one receives
from looking at them hundreds and some time
thousands of years later cemented the idea of
how vital creativity is to humanity. It was a
heart warming discovery that a woman like Mrs
Jane Loudon, who, by her own admission knew
nothing of botany, later became as synonymous
with Victorian gardening as Mrs Beeton with
cookery. It was her love, dedication and her
desire to share her hobby with others that
helped thousands of other women to discover
their own passion for gardening through her
beautifully illustrated books.

As some people favour a more simplistic
introductory and therefore feel discomfort and
promptly switch to another conversation. The
main advantage for me off course would be the
preservation of the most precious components
of all - time. Not just mine, but theirs as well.

CHRISTMAS GENTLEMAN

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