The Pearls of Catharsis Times Issue 01, Oct 2016 | Page 10

So what !? if I broke up with Nel a year ago this doesn ’ t mean anything it ’ s just the illusion of time passing that has got everyone pestering me . Besides I ’ m not completely neglecting my love life I am passively looking for the perfect person . There ’ s just so much to consider : What do I even want in a partner ? Am I looking for something serious or do I want someone just to have regular sex with ? Should I consider my most recent break-up , should I lower my standards ? Should I forget about looks and physical attraction and ask my best friend out ? Maybe I have been secretly crushing on him for a while ? Maybe a little . But I ’ m so exhausted from my previous relationship , am I really ready to go back out there ? Oh who am I kidding , I have no idea how to answer those questions , it ’ s clear what I have to do : find new friends . I just have to find a way to get rid of them with no hard feelings . It will be difficult after all , I ’ ve known them since high school , but it must be done for the sake of my sanity . “ Whoa , are you okay ?” Asks this tall dark and handsome guy from my economics class . Every time I look at him I always feel paranoid because I think he is secretly filming some block-buster-to-be and I am probably the cliché awkward nerd who doesn ’ t know their place in their world . He is so annoying , for two main reasons : fuelling my paranoia with his dark hair and beautiful face secondly , always bumping into me when I ’ m thinking . When I think to myself I walk looking down . It ’ s something that just happens and it ’ s not because I ’ m shy , I just prefer not be interrupted by people making that are you okay look while I ’ m absentmindedly looking passed them , you know ? And he , well he is always bumping into me as if he is saying he can ’ t see me walking or even worse I want him to save me from my low self-esteem , like I ’ m some sort of damsel in distress . I am not and I never will be in fact , I am probably the third strongest willed young person I know . Anyway , I nod and pick up my pace .